You can see my timeline below. WW says the A is over, that she needed to end it to figure out what to do about the marriage. I know there has been a bit of contact, very little from my cell phone/email snooping. I know the contact has to do with OMW and I'm working on that aspect.
I've just finished reading SAA and HNHN. WW doesn't know I have them. Right now, WW doesn't think she can be in love with me. She has never admitted that she loved OM to me, but I saw "I love you, XOXOX" etc in emails, so either she was BSing him or was/is really in love with him. There is no way for me to know right now if her lack of love for me has to do with OM fog or not, or if it just the parts of our relationship that got us to a place where the A was possible.
Anyway, WW doesn't seem to think she can fall back in love with me. It seems that if she is rational (big if there right now) that reading SAA and HNHN will show her that with proper effort she can. I think she wants to love me. When we talked about our situation last week, I jokingly sail, "do you know how much easier everything would be if you'd just be in love with me?" She said, "Don't you think I know that? The head and mind just aren't connecting right now."
So I do think she wants to love me because it would be best for our family if we had a good marriage. But she seems to be wandering around waiting to decide she can love me for herself like some big revelation. I try to tell her that we need to work at it, that it's just not going to happen, but she says it feels "forced".
She could be telling the truth or it could be just withdrawl fog talk. I can't tell.
So the question is, should I show her the books?
