So Many people are on plan A and I was on plan A for A little while but went to plan B. How do you know if it was the right thing? And How long does it take before it gets easier? WS has been gone 6mths.I did find out about MB for awhile so just didn't do plan A very well. I got angry a lot, cried, and begged.This site is so great. I hope I can give back when this is over.

BS 27
WS 26
OWM 26
OW BS 33
d 4
s 2
M 5yr
together 10yr

2kids.....I'm anticipating my Plan B within the next two weeks. I really can't offer any suggestions of time and easing of pain, but I have heard from those who have.

Have you been "lurking" long? I only lurked for two weeks and what I learned in those two weeks really helped my situation. I hope you can find the answers here as I have. The support is amazing and the knowledge/experience of "those who have been there" have made a lasting impact on me and where I'm at. I hope this "bump up" enables you to get some needed information......

Good Luck and BTW, you appear to be a heck of a lot stronger than I am. Six months separated. Your strength and conviction is encouraging.

If you can't do Plan A well, that's when you need to be in Plan B. No matter how badly he is hurting you, you still have no right to be angry.

No matter how badly he is hurting you, you still have no right to be angry.
Why would you write that?
She has every right to be angry.
I don’t get what you mean.

You have a right to be angry, but if you lash out in your anger, your Plan A is not going to be effective. If you cannot control your anger, it is time for Plan B, even if Plan A has not been very good or very long.

Hi 2kidsmom

I had been in Plan A since May 24. Just went to Plan B on August 16.

Went to Plan B because WH was fence sitting, and cake eating. Continued to lie to me with every breath.

He supposedly broke up with OW, but his actions didn't seem right. Through creative snooping, I found he was still in contact with her.

The last thing I found out just did it for me. I had a session with Steve Harley, and he told me to go to plan B. So I did. Have made a few mistakes with this (WH threatened suicide), and talked to him, and emailed him.

No more. Plan A is to be the best you. No LB's. No crying, begging. I read the books, and did Plan A fairly well.

Plan B is to protect you. Protect you from LBing. Protect the feelings of love you have left for WS. It also protects you from the emotional rollercoaster you've been in. It feels good not to have the A in your face 24/7.

I heard a song once called "Read the book... Don't wait for the Movie".

Good advice. Read Surviving an Affair; Love Busters; and His Needs/Her Needs. Also, Dr. Dobson's Love Must be Tough has been recommended to me.

Keep your chin up. This is a great place to come for advice and support.

This site soooo totally ROCKS! K