Need any advice you can give here.

WH had mulitple affairs one that resulted in a child. I kicked him out. His family hates me because of this.

Months later we reunite, but continue to have seperate mailing addresses and bank accounts. His family still doesn't support this marriage.

WH is retiring. He's giving me an ultimatium to move home to his home state, next to his family and OW/OC. I don't feel comfortable in this at all. I want to go anywhere else. He says he will only be happy there. I feel I will only be miserable there. H states if I want the marriage to work I need to give in.

I feel we are growing apart and this move will only cause a divorce. With all that has happened, I don't feel I should be the one to give up and/or give in but he should. Maybe I am being selfish, maybe he is - but we can't/won't comprimise anywhere.

What are your thoughts?

Runt,

Ultimatums don't fly here at MarriageBuilders. The Policy of Joint Agreement (a MB cornerstone) states that you "do nothing without the enthusiastic agreement of your spouse."

That would include moving. As well as having an affair or 6.

I would suggest that you get into MC with him, and see if you can't come up with a solution that you both can be enthusiastic about. If not, I would suggest that you not leave---if he wants to move back home, let him. You stay put---I think it will be too difficult on your marriage if you don't.

I concur with K.

Pep

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial"> Ultimatums don't fly here at MarriageBuilders. The Policy of Joint Agreement (a MB cornerstone) states that you "do nothing without the enthusiastic agreement of your spouse."
</font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Absolutely Brilliant.

!!! applauding !!!