As a BS i would love to hear comments from any ww out there.

1. what made your A stop?
2. what irritated you the most from your H during the A.
3. What are your thoughts on exposure?
4. Did you have to get to Plan B or did plan a work for you?

Im sure i and others have more questions.....

I'll answer for my wife (she'd love that... <img border="0" title="" alt="[Roll Eyes]" src="images/icons/rolleyes.gif" /> )

1. what made your A stop?

A combination of Plan B and me getting pregnant by the OM put a crimp in the fantasy of the affair.

2. what irritated you the most from your H during the A.

Everything. But especially Steve Harley.

3. What are your thoughts on exposure?

I'm not sure what her feelings would be. My exposure was very controlled---SIL only after a month, parents after 5 months (near Plan B). Kids never knew.

4. Did you have to get to Plan B or did plan a work for you?

Plan B was needed to end the affair. Plan A was essential for me with regards to having hope if I returned to the marriage---especially after I became pregnant.

K,

Thanks so much for your answers. Could explain your answer to question #2 in greater detail , please?

Well, when your spouse is in an affair, you tend to be a major irritant (something about "existing on the same planet"). No matter what I did, it was irritating to my wife.

The Steve Harley crack was that my wife did a couple counseling sessions with him while she was fully involved in the affair. Steve basically directed her to look at her actions and see how consistent they were with her values, as well as to give her insight into how her current marriage could be rebuilt to "great". WS's don't want to hear that---and it was exhausting on my wife to see the inconsistancies of her affair world with reality (remember that affairs are "fantasy"). She quit after a few sessions, but I continued for many months...

But, even several years after recovery---if we're driving along a street in MN and Steve is walking on the sidewalk---he better pray that I'm behind the wheel, and not my wife... <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

Bump^