About a month ago, I found out from our cellphone bill that my husband had been socializing with another woman. He's a barber so he comes in contact with many women. I called the ph# to see who it was. She never called me back, but she forwarded the message that I left her back to my husband. He told me that he had been to her house, that he also had kissed her, but hadn't gone any further. I left him for about 5 days. Then he kept calling me to come back home. He says that he had ended that relationship, but I still feel like he is still seeing her and talking to her, I want to ask him, but I don't really want to know the truth. The other night his phone rung around 11pm, and it showed "private". He was outside at the time and didn't know that I was listening. He told the person that he would be at work at 8am the next day and that he would talk to them then. I couldn't even sleep that night, wondering if he had been talking to her. I want to put this behind me, but things have been really good between us since I came back home, but I can't stop thinking about what else might have happened, and if my husband is still socializing with this person. According to our phone bill, he was talking with her every morning 3-4 times, late at night 3-4 times, and in the midafternoon 3-4 times. This went on for over 2 months. I asked him what it was he was attracted to and he said "BECAUSE SHE LISTENS TO ME". I just need advice in getting over this situation, and to stop driving myself crazy checking his e-mails, his cellphone, and anything else. I have even went to his job to see if anyone else was up there. Please help

<small>[ September 08, 2004, 08:03 PM: Message edited by: Ms. Parker ]</small>

Would you care 2 elaborate? Presumably, that woman wasn't his sister or mother.

When did this happen? What do you think it "meant" 2 him? How long have you been married? How are things between the 2 of you? Do you have kids?

best,
-ol' 2long

2long-We have been married almost 4 years in December. We have a 3 year old in common, and I have a 6 year old from a previous marriage, and he has a 10 year old from a previous relationship.

No this wasn't his mother or sister. He told me that he met her at the barbershop and that he cuts her son's hair.

It started July 21 and I found out last month. Even on the day I left August 19, he called and talked to her for 59 minutes.

I don't know if they are still talking or not, according to our cellphone records, her # isn't appearing anymore, but she might be calling the shop now. And I don't know if he is still cutting her child's hair. He said he had ended it, but I am still doubtful.

Out relationship has been pretty stable since that incident, but I am still very insecure about the whole thing.

Who is the woman? Is she married?

Does your H feel like you don't listen to him? Is that true?

Hi Melodylane, thank you for posting. The lady comes to the barbershop that he works for. Her son gets his haircut by my husband. He told me that she is not married, and had no problem being with him or talking with him, knowing that he was.

Ms. Parker, I kinda new here so I'm sure you'll get responses from much more experienced members, but how long can you go on not knowing? I couldn't live with that. If you ask and he confirms that he is having an A with her, E or P or otherwise then at least you can begin to recover. I wish my husband had told me what the problem he had was instead of going to someone else. You have the opportunity to stop it before it happens, if it hasn't. Take care and may the lord be with you and your husband.