Here is an email W sent a couple of days ago:

I am sorry you are so down. I know it is hard to come back after a great vacation especially under the circumstances. I am sorry for everything and I am trying to make things work. Like I have said before I cnnot change my feelings but I hope with time they will change. Do not blame Italy for this it is my fault and if we were in Spain it would have been a Spaniard, if we were in the U.S. it would have been an American. I needed something else. I was lonely and drained and emotionally broken. I know I will never make you
understand this but for me I need to try. Hope your day gets better. What do you want for dinner? love you, X

A little background, we returned from a week in Crete back to Italy. The last few months I have become increasingly iratated with Italy and Italians. Affairs are the norm here, especially with men. Italian men are ALWAYS looking to hook up, especially with American women. I detest men that cheat on their wives, or even attempt to. So in that way, I do blame Italy and the culture, very morally bankrupt here.

Also, I did a killer Plan A on vacation, not a single mention of the A or our relationship. Just time together on the beach, never a cross word between us.

I feel for the first time that thier is REAL hope here. What do y'all think?

I think there is hope if contact has ended. Has contact ended?

She says contact has ended, but I cannot 100% verify. I think that NC is in place, but that is just my inkling.

BT, I would discuss it with her and find out for sure. If you aren't sure, then I would find some way to find out, such as some creative snooping. Do they have Radio Shacks over there where you could buy a voice activated recorder? Can you get her phone and get his # and do a reverse look up to get his name and address?

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Do not blame Italy for this it is my fault and if we were in Spain it would have been a Spaniard, if we were in the U.S. it would have been an American. I needed something else. I was lonely and drained and emotionally broken. I know I will never make you
understand this but for me I need to try. </font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">ooookkaayyyyy...."Mommy, I'm sorry...but right and wrong don't count, only my "feelings" count and whatever I want to do...."

"lonely and drained and emotionally broken." So what caused this situation? What prevents this situation from repeating? What safeguards have you both put in place to prevent a recurrence of her "justifications" for willfully sinning?

I don't hear repentance in her comments. I hear blame shifting, justifications, and rationalizations. Much work remains to be done. The question remains are you BOTH willing to DO the hard work and to face reality and to accept responsibility for your own actions and choices?

God bless.