I went with my WW to her new apt for the first time. She is going to take the kids there tomorrow to start the cleaning process. She hopes to paint at least two rooms by next weekend so she can move in a week from Sunday. She called some old male friends, her new girlfriend and her boyfriend (OM best friend) to help with the move. I offered to help move out. I plan to stare at the OM best friend when I meet him. When he asks what am I looking at, I am going to say "I want to see what your kind look like" In response to his "my kind?" question, I plan to say "The kind of man who is OK with his best friend ruining a marriage and destroying a family Just to make sure I avoid people like him in the future". Oh the rage is so theroputic!!!!!!!


I started to lecture her again, and tried to stop myself. I mostly stopped myself, but it is so hard. To see the crappy little apt my kids are going to spend 1/2 there time in when they have a beautifal house with a great yard, kids to play with and all that stuff. I told her again, this better be making her VERY happy. She is causing alot of pain, t better be worth it. She just looks down.

I am starting to hate her. I cannot think of a reason to even want to try with this woman. It does not make sense to me. I can find someone to make me happy. Who will love me and my kids. Not just my house and car.

I plan to have a giant 'freedom' party after she moves out. Everyone is invited. Bring all your friends, I will have an extra room soon!!!

I guess there is no question, just venting. I guess I have to work 2x hard at being a GREAT dad.


Even with all this, I still plan to go to plan B as soon as she is gone and we are oficially seperated. 1st draft of seperation papers will be done by 21SEP04. I hope the final will not take too much longer than that. She should be gone by then. Maybe I will have a Halloween party?

Either prozac is awesume, or I am turning a corner. I still love and want her, but I could kill her given a chance. How can she p!ss on our marriage?

I am going to expose the A to some of her co-workers in the next few days. Is that bad?


I guess I did have a question after all.

CanTH- I feel your pain man. I wouldn't direct too much anger at the friend. He may have said things against the affair to OM you just don't know. I mean, he probably is an [censored] though. Birds of a feather flock together. I have struggled with the same feelings that you are feeling right now and man is it tough. All I know is that my OM is lucky that there are laws that protect him in this country. Otherwise...well...don't need to elaborate.
She is doing a ton of damage right now without thought, but believe me it WILL hit her hard at some point. My WW is just starting to go thru that now.

I struggle with feelings of hate towards my WW too.

"I still love and want her, but I could kill her given a chance. How can she p!ss on our marriage?" That quote sounds like one of my own past thoughts. Scary, isn't it?

I will let the older vets give you advice on that exposure question. Just wanted u to know that I have been, am, and will be where u are at right now. You are not alone.

Party? Did I hear party? Sounds like a great idea.

I think the prozac is starting to work.

Congratulations! You have oficially entered the ANGER phase. Or shall we call it...what was your term?... the "blind rage" phase?! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Razz]" src="images/icons/tongue.gif" />
It took me a long time to get the the anger phase, it didn't happen till WH moved out. Maybe there's a pattern there...

I must caution you, though, about one thing. Are you in Plan A? You said something about moving to Plan B, so I'm guessing you're in Plan A. If so, it sounds like this angry phase has got you doing some LBing, which isn't good. When you are around her, my suggestion is to not even bring up anything relationship related or anything that gets those feelings rumbling in you. It's just so much easier not to LB that way.

Try directing that anger somewhere else, and PLEASE don't waste your words or energy on OM's friend. It will only make you look like the bad guy, especially in WW's eyes. It will not help your cause at all, and although it may provide temporary satisfaction, it's not worth it.

Have you written that poem yet? <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" />

FHL: How did you get so wise so quick?

Exposure

hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />
That is me laughing hysterically at that comment. Wise would not be my #1 choice of descriptive words for me. Read my thread on the Dovorcing board for an illustration...
Thanks though. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" /> Really, anything I HAVE learned has been first of all from making a ton of mistakes, and second from everyone here.

Unfortunately, I never got the chance to do an airtight Plan A because I found this site too late, after messing up my version of Plan A for months on end. Hopefully, I can at the very least help others learn a little something from my mistakes...