I need some help going through withdrawl. I am new to all of this but from what I read that is my situation.

I have had a long distance Emotional A w/ a priest for about 3 years. We only see each other 1 or 2 times a year but stay in contact via e-mail, phone and family visits. It has always been hot and cold, a few flirty e-mails and nothing serious for 5 or 6 months. I didn't think much of it but knew I was in love with him. Last year he admited his serious feelings then backed off stating religous reasons, but remained friends.
ROCKY marrage.. Physical run ins with H have stopped since kids were born 10 & 6. Until last fall when he thought I was going to leave him. Why it makes me love H more is NUTZ but H always seems to need me so bad after he flips out. H got on zoloft and does better but H always tries to "skip" med. I can always tell. H has threatened on more than 6 or 7 occasions that he would kill me and committ suicide if I ever cheated on him. We were having a great year until OM again admitted he had feelings for me and actually kissed me, we e-mailed daily for a few weeks and again he ended it after a "retreat", I know he is right, dumping me for God and honestly how perfect is that??????
I have always loved H, and wanted him to love me, he has always turned me on and our sex life has always been great, infact I am almost always the aggressor... I have always tried to be perfect and beautiful and to please him but now I have lost my desire for him, his smell repulses me? I want to feel good w/ him again, I want to not think of the OM.
WHAY Whinny I know but I miss my OM so bad, I know he is doing the right thing for both of us, last we talked I was joking him and said he had No sacrafice that he was spoiled and he looked me dead in the eyes and said I was his sacrafice.
I feel so trapped in a dead end marriage but I have been a house wife for so long and have looked for a job, I am unemployable. I want to love my H again, I want to feel good with him and enjoy him, he is trying so hard to be nice to me and the kids... Do you all really think it will help me to tell him about the OM???

Tea.....I'm fairly new here and I don't have much "experienced" advice. I'm wondering if you've read His Needs/Her Needs?

I'm sure one of the "experienced MBr's" will respond about telling your H about OM. It does sound to me like you're having withdrawals but it also sounds like the OM has moments of clarity followed by moments of fog. Dragging you along for the ride.

You've found the right place though. There is so much experience, knowledge and support on this site that it's comforting and "addicting" at times. I know I post/read/post almost daily because there are so many people in the same situations that I learn something new everyday.

Keep posting and Good Luck........LS