Well it is like this in the last 2 months I found out that my husband was having an affair. I actually felt something so I checked his telephone records and saw a number there that was listed up to 10 times a day. I choose to call the number and find out who it was. Once I realized that it was a woman he had been seeing, I was hurt and shocked. I questioned him and he didn't really seem to care and didn’t give me a direct answer. We then decided to go on and he change his cell phone number. I then found out later that he did not completely end the affair. The women called me and advised that my husband had gotten her pregnant and she had and abortion and etc. I was devastated and did not know what to do. I asked him if it was true and he denied it and said she wanted to get back at because he had attempted to end the affair. As we thought everything was over we took a family vacation to ease the situation. Once we got back I received another copy of the cell bill and yet again her number was on it I advise my husband at this point I was leaving. Now during this entire time this woman has called me on my cell, my house phone on a daily bases advising me of what my husband did. Then my husbands called the women while I was there and advise her that it was over. She then advises him that she had taken warrant out on me for harassing phone calls. I never thought anything of it because I knew I never not once harassed her. Well I went to work the next day and was arrested at work. I was in total shock. I could not believe that because someone does not like u that they can go down and take a warrant out without proof. Well now we are dealing with having to get a lawyer and the other things that come with things of this nature, also I am physically dealing with the affair still. I am so very stressed out. I love my husband dearly and feel that we can work things out but I want this woman out of out lives forever. I am not sure what her next move will be or if I can trust my husband ever again after this.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Mona,

If I didn't know better I would think that your OW lives in Northern CA. Sounds a lot like the one I had to deal with. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Eek!]" src="images/icons/shocked.gif" />

What proof did this OW give the police? Your cell records? Pull her's. Pull your H's and prove she is the one calling.

OWs like that want to show they control not only the WS but also the BS. Don't give her that satisfaction.

Ows like that will concot a story and even all women's abuse shelters, your church, the police and fabricate stories up the ying yang. Don't put nothing past these type of psycho's.

What is your H doing now?

What happened after you were arrested?

take care,
L.

Mona,

You and your H can have a good marriage again. Not the same as it was before the A but a stroner, deeper, more solid marriage. But it's going to take alot of work,,from BOTH of you! Trust? It will return eventually if your H now makes his life an open book for you. He HAS to be accountable so you have no reason for doubts. You will never have "blind trust" again but we should never have had that to begin with.

Read Mona, Read ALL parts of this site. And post. Even if you don't get alot of responses, POST! And respond to your posters. Answer their questions, ask questions, seek guidance, gain knowledge. There's a lot of very compassionate souls here either walking the same path as you or have already traveled it.

As to the next step of the OW? My best advice is DOCUMENT. Document everything. Any and every phone call, any attempt by her at contact of any kind, any kind or correspondence. Keep records, time place, date, recap of the incident. Be prepared for court. Don't just go in there empty handed and throw yourself on their mercy. Fight back. Show them this woman has invaded YOUR life! As Orchid said,,seek past records. And do NOTHING to contact her. Not in any way.

You and your H can get through this. It's going to be alot of work but pulling together, it IS possible. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

Bumping this to the top so Mona can see she has had responses to her post....