My WW moved out today. The move was rather un-eventfull. She had two of her old friends come over, me and my sister H came over to help load the truck.

Than, she left and the OM and her new friends helped her move in

She just came and got her dog and cat. Now it is just me, the kids and one cat.

She is saying things that lead me to believe she is regretting her decision to leave. I know that I am currently not sane, but it felt nice to hear her say things like "Just think, you can all help me move back in 6 months from now!" One of her old friends already told her he would not help her move back in.

She told me Saturday that she is not leaving me to pursue her A (I told her she was lying to me and to please stop). She told me she thinks that she is going to realise soon that she is giving up quite a bit. She also plans to get some IC.

Our seperation agreement rough draft will be done Tuesday.

Well, I am actually tired (my brother got married Saturday, WW moved out Sunday!) so this is all for tonight.

I think that once we seperate, I am going to try plan B. I am not sure though, because she seems to be finally thinking about her actions.

I hope you all feel good today!!!!

You need to watch her actions, and not her words. Sorry you had to go through this today.

Gads! This takes me back 4 mos. I'm sorry you had to go through that....been there.

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial"> Now it is just me, the kids and one cat. </font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">If the kids are staying with you, bless your soul for keeping them away from that repugnant relationship. I have not had a chance to read all of your other posts, so I don't know the background and it's too late for me to go researching.

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial"> I think that once we seperate, I am going to try plan B. I am not sure though, because she seems to be finally thinking about her actions.
</font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">I'm not about to say I have the definitive answer on what you should do in your situation, but in my opinion plan B is best done in conjunction with their departure. This assumes that all exposure has been done and your plan A has been good enough and long enough. Get her signature on the agreement, and hand over a plan B letter. You should already have one ready to go, just in case. Post it here for the "wise ones" to take a look first.

I wanted to give my plan B letter as soon as WW moved out. Unfortunately the agreement was still being tossed back and forth between lawyers. A WS will always want to ease them selves from the matrimonial home and relationship before they feel settled into their new home. My WW wanted me to come over for movie nights with the kids at her house. The "separation anxiety" and maternal instincts should be capitalized upon. Let her "think about her actions" while experiencing the "thunderclap" of her consequences.

Having not done a Plan B myself, I'm not sure I have the right to say this, but I'm going to anyway. I agree with Binder. If you're going to do a Plan B, do it when she leaves for maximum effect.

I know, Plan B is supposed to protect the BS, but some say it's also to help move the WS off the fence.

My WH moved out in 2/04. I tried a Plan B a couple weeks after he moved but failed at it because I wasn't strong enough to go dark. I kept answering the phone when he called.

I have no guarantee that had I stuck to a good Plan B there at first, he'd have turned around. But he said similar things to what your WW is saying--stuff like "I'm not going to take such-and-such right now because I'd just have to move it back in a few months". I believe he was very unsure at that point about what he was doing.

I do know, though, that it didn't take him long to get used to living on his own. Had I have tried Plan B months later, it would probably have still protected my feelings and perhaps stalled my filing for D, but I don't think it would have had any effect on my WH. He was no longer counting on my meeting any of his needs anyway, so wouldn't have been missing anything by my being dark.

LL

My plan is to go to plan B when the seperation agreement is signed. I am not sure how it will work, but I am ready.

I am struggling with how to do it when we have kids that need to be 'handed off' 2 or 3 times a week. Can anyone give me some tips? They (kids) go to daycare two days a week. On the hand off days, I can drop them off and have the WW pick them up or vice-versa. But I am not sure about the other days. I have asked so much of my family already, I dread asking for more help.

I know she still depends on me for some things. That is why I want to plan B ASAP for maximum effect. I also know that she will adapt to living alone quickly and I think she will like it alot. I am beginning to think I am better off without her.

She did tell me this morning that she did not sleep well. She has never lived alone before.

I just mailed her an anniversy card. A whopping 4 years on the 23rd. I addressed it to Mrs. XXX and signed it Husband.

Have a good day all!