There have been many times that your harshness has rubbed a nerve with me, but I'm not confrontational by nature, so I avoid the post from that point on.

Well this time I just have to point out something you posted to thatsall that really just pushed it over the top for me.

You wrote: </font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Oh, I'm sorry, I forgot. YOUR pain and YOUR feelings are justification for behaving like a wounded animal. </font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">I'm floored here. I can't begin to understand how you can make this statement to a BS. It was condescending and insulting. I'm awfully glad this isn't the type of support I received on this board 7 months ago when I was trying to figure out what to do with MY DDAY.

Yikes.

I'm sorry if I offended you, but you offended me AS a BS, and I was offended at the statement to thatsall, because he TOO is a BS, and is probably doing just the best that he can right now.

A good 2X4 is called for from time to time, but I think that was really harsh, for someone 5 weeks into DDAY.

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Thats all posted in response to the post you are offended by: FH, you're awesome. Thank you!!

It's me that is in the fog...

oh man......
</font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">If what I said offended Thatsall, I will gladly offer him my apology.

I KNOW and UNDERSTAND and REMEMBER quite well the craziness that follows discovery of the affair and the way our emotions often control us. It has nothing to do with whether or not it is right for us to have those rapidly and wildly swinging emotions. We DO have that right and they are are a normal consequence of having everything we believed in, and about, our spouse trashed.

You pull a quotation out of the context of the entire message and get "offended". Okay, I offer you my apology for offending you.

But please remember I was NOT posting to you. I was posting to someone else who was dealing with their current problem. Sometimes analogies may not be the "best" or may hit other readers differently, but my point was really quite simple: The emotions and the Love Busting ARE normal reactions IF we don't rein them in by conscious control of our minds. NO, it's not "right" that we have to endure sometimes, but it is "right" when WE have made the decision to do what is necessary to recover our marriages.

If we don't want to do that, what's the point in attempting recovery? It IS a confusing time. It's part of the rollercoaster, and one of the "benefits" of MB is to have others available to say, "stop and think about what you are doing" because THEY have also been there and done similar things.

Have you ever inadvertantly injured and animal and then tried to reach out your hand to try to begin to treat the injury only to have the scared and suspicious animal react instinctively and bite your hand? His wife HAS injured him and he is reacting, not thinking. THAT is the difference in the analogy. Animals react, Humans can choose how to react by force of will.

So again, if it was offensive to you personally, please accept my apology.