I think I'm ready to sign the DV papers. I don't want the divorce, but I need to put this behind me. This is so difficult, this was the man I was suppose to grow old with and have children with.

We been together for fourteen years. I was barely legal to drink back then. Now I'm starting to hit forty (I still have a few years before that happens) and thoughts of going back into the dating world, scares the living H@#$ out of me. And sex, that scares me more since my Wh is the only guy I have ever been with.

How do you learn to trust again, or get over the pain? My WH is thousands of miles away now, living in Sin City with the OW...Perfect huh!

I can't save this relationship long distance and I need some closure. I love him very much and will always love him. How can fight for this marriage...so signing the DV papers and moving on is the only thing I can do.

HD2,

Sorry to hear that things are coming to that. I can understand your need for closure so you can move on though. Saving the M long distance while he is with OW seems pretty improbable.

Hang in there. Take things one day at a time and focus on taking care of yourself.

I feel your pain. I'm sort of in the same sitch. My WS is still in the area but haven't heard from her in over 10 weeks. She's talking about marrying OM. 17 years gone. I've been with her since I was 21. I go out a lot now and meet women all the time. All I do is compare them to her. I haven't dated yet, that's not where I'm at, I'm just meeting people. But like you said, I don't know how or when I'm going to ever truly trust again the way I trusted for 17 years. If WS could do this to me? Ya know? It's going to be so hard to open my heart. And it seems everyone I meet is divorced with children. I haven't had my own child yet. I'm so lost and so scared right now. And the last thing WS said was she wanted me to move on so I could be happy...huh! I hate this. God bless...