FamilyMatters - I was trying to find some way on the site to contact you directly rather than on the board, but couldn't find one.
I'm curious to get some insight from you, since your situation and mine seem more similar than mine to others on this board:
Namely, I am now a FWH with a BS who is also a WW and still in the midst of her A.
My A's started a few years ago and continued off and on up until this past August. There were 5 different OW involved, 6 if you count an EA I had (and my W discovered) many years ago. None of them was a romantic A, mostly EA/PA, they were all mostly about ego boosting and my needs, I wasn't in love with anyone.
D-Day was July 27. I was thrown out of the house and haven't returned, and now live with friends in a shared house.
The only reason my W found out about my A's was she was in the process of covering up her own, which she had started less than a month before. She met her OM at work and it was more of an EA + PA than any of mine were, she actually has contemplated/may still be contemplating being with him, even though he lives on the East Coast and has no intention of moving anytime soon.
After D-Day, neither of us admitted to full-blown PA's, only EA's, but the truth gradually came out over the course of the month.
As of the week of Sept. 6, I committed working things out, did NC with all my OW, and started cleaning up my act. I've been pretty good at it.
However, my BS has not done the same. She is still in her A with her OM and is seriously foggy - some days she wants me back, other days she doesn't.
She makes frequent trips back East to see him, and he has come here to see her once in the last 2 months (fortunately they stayed at a hotel and not in our house where I still pay rent!)
I am fully involved in Plan A and this is where I'm hoping you can help:
My Plan A is obviously going to be more difficult because of 2 factors:
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- <font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">My WW is also a BS and in serious pain and doubt over my infidelity, and</font></li>
- <font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">I am not living at home and can't be there to fill EN's as much as I'd like (however, neither can OM)</font></li>
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Since these 2 things make me different from alot of the others here where there is a clearly defined BS and WS, I'm hoping your similar situation and observed success in rebuilding your M can help me with my situation.
Thanks alot!! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />
