Today H noticed the book I was reading...SAA. The response I expected happened.."what are you reading that for?" what if someone sees that?"

Due to an STD test <img border="0" title="" alt="[Frown]" src="images/icons/frown.gif" /> this deed was brought front and center in our house hold once again.
I know in my heart I have forgiven for his dirty deed but have also set boundries that must, and I mean must not be crossed.

Anyway, after the initial response from seeing my reading material, h held me and said some pretty nice things. Such as he knows I'm taking a pro active stand in this R and that he can count on me. He says that maybe he doesn't always understand me but he realizes that our R is always first on my mind and I'd do anything to make it better He knows he can be the man I want/need and will do what it takes. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />
Pretty good, right?

It is a start.... in the right direction. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" />

As for his comments about: .."what are you reading that for?" what if someone sees that?" ....well can tell him something like: I am reading it for support. If someone sees it then I hope it can help them also. BTW, how can you provide me with more reassurance and support so I don't have to keep reading this book so much?

Something like that. Put the onis on him. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

JMHO,
L.

Thanks O. I just read your thread on reverse babble and will try that next time he remarks on my reading material. I'll start His needs/her needs next.

I still have some trouble believing that this was his first ONS. Everywhere I turn people are talking about cheating spouses. People on business, going away to 3/4 day seminars, going out of the country and even who is more likely to cheat a Democratic or Republican.

My H has traveled our whole married life, who knows what happened? (I guess he does) However, he has said over and over again that this was the first time and he's soooo sorry. I have to stop thinking like this....but for some reason when I'm by myself my gut tells me that this was the only time he got caught because he got sick.

When we're together I believe him, but I always did believe him.

My guess is that this is the trust stuff again.

I'll keep reading and sharing my information with H.

Re