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Joined: Mar 2004
Posts: 139
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OP
Member
Joined: Mar 2004
Posts: 139 |
I have not been on board in
while. I am usually reading
others stories though. I am
not sure if any remember me.
I am FWW-my DDay was 5-04,
but my PA ended 11-03, so the
DATE is approaching. I am in
off/on thought of OM. why? I
don't know myself. time has
eased a lot of intensity-but I
know my H still struggles with
it. I am not sure what to say
to him, because I just don't
want to discuss it at all. too
much pain. I would like him to
go back to our MC-for him. but
he has to want it for himself.
I read from the guys here who
are hurting like my H. I want my
marriage-but I also want my
freedom. I still do some things
that may upset him-I don't know.
He won't say. I am still at odds
most of time-not sure of direction.
My heart is still healing too-
help me out with some words
of wisdom-pal
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Joined: Mar 2000
Posts: 1,885
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Joined: Mar 2000
Posts: 1,885 |
I don't really have too much advice but I just wanted to say hang in there and be patinet. Let your H know you love him and want to save your M. If my WH would have at least let me know those things....we would be in a different place right now. He never even gave me a chance.
Good luck...
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Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 4,178
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Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 4,178 |
PAL, maybe some kind of generous gestures, directed not just towards your husband, but also toward his friends or family or the world outside, might go a long way for you.
You feel guilt. Do you think it might help to make some amends in a general sense? You created a heap of pain, and its ripples spread probably to others besides just your husband.
I don't know where this suggestion comes from. I think some selflessness could do something for you is all.
GC
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Joined: Mar 2004
Posts: 139
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OP
Member
Joined: Mar 2004
Posts: 139 |
yes-good advice.
I am trying.
guilt-this I know.
I just feel I need
to scream some days.
my meds keep me from
emotional outbursts.
I cant really cry-
it is at the edge-
but never give in.
I think I am just
concerned for H. so
much inside he is
not sharing.
thanks-pal
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Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 4,178
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Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 4,178 |
PAL, I can imagine.
Not crying frustrates me a little sometimes too. I've only done it a handful of times since I went on ADs.
GC
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Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 2,813
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Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 2,813 |
Peaceandlove, I remeber you and your story. I’ve send a combined post to you and Bosstenor on this thread. Please read it. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" /> Blessings, Suzet
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Joined: Sep 2003
Posts: 27,069
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Joined: Sep 2003
Posts: 27,069 |
PAL -
Glad you are still hanging in there. Have you and your husband made changes to eliminate the things that might have facilitated the A?
Are you spending 15 hours a week doing fun things together?
Time to reclaim your life AND your marriage.
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