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Joined: Aug 2004
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Joined: Sep 2004
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HI Sad-
Not yet, my first plan is to tell him using the same lingo in the letter, however, if he does not listen, I will have to use the letter.
Did you read my post yesterday on Former WW H's? I tried to tell OM yesterday it was over, but read the post, you'll see what I was up against.
My prayer partner doesn't think OM will believe me and I may have to have my counselor speak to him as well. We will see..
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Joined: Aug 2004
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</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by Waking Up:
<strong> HI Sad-
Not yet, my first plan is to tell him using the same lingo in the letter, however, if he does not listen, I will have to use the letter.
Did you read my post yesterday on Former WW H's? I tried to tell OM yesterday it was over, but read the post, you'll see what I was up against.
My prayer partner doesn't think OM will believe me and I may have to have my counselor speak to him as well. We will see.. </strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">How is he contacting you?
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Joined: Sep 2004
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Joined: Aug 2004
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</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by Waking Up: <strong> Calling me at work. </strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Can you simply refuse his calls? Sorry if this is rehashing what you already have discussed. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />
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Joined: Sep 2004
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Sad-
I wish it were that easy...
Ending the A will be a tremendous blow to OM. He is hoping against hope and believing that we will be together. Afterall, I have told him we would be for years...
In the past I have ended the A 3-4 times and OM has always had access to me via phone and friends in the company I work for, not to mention OM worked for the same company and quit before our A began. My point is that he could come in here on a daily basis and no one would be suspicious.
If I end it today, OM will call until he can no longer call. He always wore me down and I caved in again. He would stay away a few days, then it would start all over again.
By waiting till the end of the week, he will no longer have contact with me via phone or friends..
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Joined: Aug 2004
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So the NC language/letter is what you are going to use at the end of the week? I understand now.
Good luck to you WU- I hope that emotionally you are doing ok. Despite the *rightness* or *wrongness* of the feelings, I know you are feeling guilty about OM- in addition to your husband. Thinking of you.
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Joined: Sep 2004
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Thank you Sad..
I am becoming more prepared everyday and look forward to a new beginning..
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Joined: Apr 2001
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WakingUp, I would suggest never talking to him again. If you send him a letter and CC your H, he will know you mean business. And if he tries to call you, he will quickly get the message if you hang up when he calls.
The reason that the letter is the preferred method is because it should be made clear that contact is to NEVER take place again. If you call him to tell him this, you are breaking your vow for no contact and opening the door for needless negotiation that only casts doubt on your sincerity.
Does your H know you are still in contact with the OM?
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Joined: Sep 2004
Posts: 173
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Joined: Sep 2004
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</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">
Does your H know you are still in contact with the OM?
</font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">No..
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