Well, it's beena wild week. After 4 months of "false recovery"? Deb, left last Sunday while I was at church. Monday night...it seems tha fog was breaking a bit...as she brought me supper and spend the evening. I haven't seen her since...but she has called everyday but not yet today. While I was at my Christian M/C last night she stopped here at our home and picked up a few more personal things. I mentioned a M seminar that was coming up in a few weeks...told her, we can stay apart but if she wanted maybe we could attend. Later, she said is there another one a little later on? So, tell me folks is there anything else to do other than going dark? Each time she phoned she asks a ton of questions about where and what I've been doing. My fight is winding down...8 months seems long...but heck, if she was sick with cancer...I'd be there my her for years...Peace and God Bless us all!

If she was sick with cancer..you would be there for her, certainly..but would you try and treat her cancer with asprin?

If we are to operate with the understanding that your wife has an illness..then the treatment must be in accordance with it.

You have read the MB concepts?

So you have a basic understanding of how these things affect the dynamics of an affair?

Your wife is getting just enough from you to be able to dismiss you. Does that make sense? You are not saying all or nothing. So she takes what she wants and goes on her merry way.

This isn't good for either of you.

If you have done a satisfactory plan A..it probably is time for plan B..either to help her realize what she gains from being married to you and choose to salvage it..or to help you detach in preparation for D.

Only you know if the timing is right.

I think Orchid had a great thread called "who is afraid of plan B".. maybe give that a read?

--Noodle

Thanks Noodle...advice like that seems harsh but your right...I was'nt the best H for a couple yrs. prior to A...but I've tried with all the Lord gives me for these last 8 months.

Hey, I've searched for Orchids plan B...but can't find it. I sent her an e mail to work...letting her know I found this on here today..."Sorrow looks back,Worry looks around,but faith looks up." She replied "that's pretty good...are you working tonight?". I don't understand that question unless she wanted to see where I was going to be? I think...maybe I'm in denial...this is most likely over.

Well....I went out with some of my old friends last night....had a girl tell me I just missed OM, I guess more people knew what was going on with Deb...I was having a good time til then. I think this being away is easier than the way we was beginning to be...me trying so hard to be loving and Deb trying to let me find my way out. Had a lady tell me "you're cute"...W always said that...it makes feel good and lonely at the same time.