How are you doing today? <img border="0" title="" alt="[Frown]" src="images/icons/frown.gif" />

Noodle

Noodle,

Mainly numbness with periods of almost unbearable grief.

I have been thinking about you today. It must be very hard for you. What are you doing for YOU today?

Cymanca---Thank you so much for your words in my husband's thread! No need to apologize to me. That was then, this is now. I was not myself in those "dark" days.
Ihope you can find happiness again someday. You seem like a very good,gentle man, and handsome too, I saw YOur pic! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" /> So, I am sure you will find a woman that will appreciate and love you with all her heart. And you will see this part of your life like a stepping stone to find true happiness.
Wish you luck and happiness Cymanca!

Sincerely

MYRTA

Thank you all for your thoughts and wishes. So happy to have that day over with.

Just an addendum to my note. While I spent the day Monday, our wedding anniversary, grieving for our M and its memories, WW was throwing a party at my home. Just found that out from my next door neighbor, who knows ( as do ALL of our small developement neighbors and think it was disgraceful)the complete truth about what really happened these last few months.
Did I ever know this woman? Does she have a shred of compassion or feelings for the last 8 years of our lives? What kind of monster can act like this, begging to be Mrs. Cymanca again and then 4 weeks later throwing a party on our anniversary date.

<small>[ November 11, 2004, 09:40 PM: Message edited by: Cymanca ]</small>

OUCH- that had to sting.
Have you discussed it with her? Why is she in the house and not you anyway? Out of the kindness of your heart? Maybe it is time that kindness starts to run cold?

How are you dealing with that?

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by Cymanca:
<strong> Just an addendum to my note. While I spent the day Monday, our wedding anniversary, grieving for our M and its memories, WW was throwing a party at my home. Just found that out from my next door neighbor, who knows ( as do ALL of our small developement neighbors and think it was disgraceful)the complete truth about what really happened these last few months.
Did I ever know this woman? Does she have a shred of compassion or feelings for the last 8 years of our lives? What kind of monster can act like this, begging to be Mrs. Cymanca again and then 4 weeks later throwing a party on our anniversary date. </strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Man, sorry for your pain. I hope that you find peace with all of this. I never thought I would. There was a time when I remember telling my good friend of 25 years that I didn't think that I would ever get over this. In my heart of hearts I really didn't. I was wrong and the pain has lifted and the sun is coming in. It will happen in time, TRUST ME ON THIS. Your grieving is good. Your WW is not the person you fell in love with, remember that. That person is dead, and that is who you should be grieving for...not the callous, deceitful woman your STEX is. Hang in there.

P.S. What specilaty are you in, I don't recall you telling me.

KMEJ,

When I found out about her lying to me after our reconciliation( initiated by me), I packed my bags and left. I vowed to her that the only way my shadow would ever cross that threshold was if we were Mr & Mrsw Cymanca again with a NC letter in my hand and wedding rings on our fingers.

I have been in my own Plan B since then(I did not know of this forum and its guidelines. I just went on gut instinct, my line in the sand). I have spoken to her only when initiated by her and usually caught by surprise and when my brother was almost killed several weeks ago( the "I want to be Mrs. Cymanca again " call). I have stopped paying ALL the bills and am willing to deal with the credit repercussions when they come(I have pretty simple needs and can not envision making any big purchases for the next several years)

<small>[ November 11, 2004, 10:00 PM: Message edited by: Cymanca ]</small>

you are very strong.

Wish I had time to write more, kids are still up, need to put them to bed. I will be on tomorrow to talk more.

Good night good man

KMEJ,

I am alone. No kids. I do what I must do to live with myself. Going through what you and all the other parents are going through, now THAT is strength.

Good night to you and the children.

Cymanca-Your wife just wants to hurt you, because she knows that she lost her chance with you. She knew you were going to find out about the party. She knows you are hurting and I am sure she is too in her own way. She probably was having "empty fun". No one can feel happy after doing so much damage to another person.
I Hope you can find happiness and peace soon.
You really deserve the BEST!

Take care of yourself!

Myrta

Myrta,

Thank you so much for the graciousness of your reply. Knowing what you have gone through and getting these very kind words means an awful lot to me.

You and your husband are in my prayers not just because you are here at MB but especially for all the inspiration that you provide on this board.

Cymanca -

The pain will go away, and you won't even remember it anymore. That's what everyone told me when I got here. I never thought it would, but it did.

I'm surprised you're not reading the doctor and nurse fight on the ACTIONS thread.