I am torn over this issue, first I really beleive it would be better coming from their own spouse, but I don't know if that would happen. I also feel that if the one husband who knew 3 years ago would have told me, maybe my H wouldn't have made it to # 5. ( he cheated with 5 other women). I realize this is all speculation but I really felt cheated out of those years from his decision not to tell me. On the other hand I do understand how difficult it is because that's where I now sit.<P>The one girl is getting married soon, and I feel like her fiance deserves to know what kind of person he is willing to commit to. In the beginning, I talked to another girl who is married and I told her that I knew and I was giving her the opportunity to tell her husband before I did. At the end of the conversation, although I changed my mind and told her so. I felt that I would not want me worst enemy to feel like I feel, so I told her it was her decision alone and I would not push the issue. If she belives me or not I don't know but I think she felt safe. I wonder if I did that right thing then?<P>I have not contacted the others although I'm sure they all know I know now as they work together. I don't even know who three of them are, never met them but I am curious. That's another issue, do I really want to see their faces, especially the one getting married. She was the one my H had the most feelings for. I sometimes feel it's unfair I don't know who she is, what if I ran into her at a baby shower or something, you know what a small world we live in.<P>Anyway, I could use some advice on this issue and some experience others have had here. I realize that the revelation may cause more harm than good as two of the guys are very likely would become violent, and I need to think of my children. On the other hand, that may not be an issue and the couples would choose their own paths quietly. <P>Is there a safe way to handle this ie. letter or a phone call from a concerned "friend"? Sometimes I feel I should let it go into God's hands, but I feel He's too busy with other issues and He could use a little bit of my help!<P>If anyone has a positive experience PLEASE let me know, this is all just so new to me and I need collective wisdom. Thanks for listening.
