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Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 28
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Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 28 |
Couldn't take it anymore. Started plan B. Guess it's over. Miss him, but no choice. I felt I had to. He's living with her. Needed some distance from it all. He seemed fine with it today.
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Joined: Sep 2001
Posts: 5,733
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Joined: Sep 2001
Posts: 5,733 |
Have you done plan A ?
Have A been exposed ?
Have you wrote and given plan B letter to him ?
Hang in there ... go dark !. -rh-
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Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 339
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Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 339 |
I feel the same way in my situation Tawny. But I 2nd the questions from RH. Have you followed the program correctly? Please post back and let us know what is up.
C.
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Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 4,178
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Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 4,178 |
Tawny - this is a valuable post. Too bad everybody flocks to little MB feuds these last couple of weeks.
I was hesitant about plan B because there were so few firsthand posts that warned against the danger of avoiding it. I'm wicked glad I did it. I'm no happier, but my love for my WW is safely hanging on, on life support.
GC
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Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 28
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Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 28 |
I gave him about 6 weeks of nurturing and plan A. I couldn't stand hearing about her one more second. I was calm and typed him a message that was short and sweet. It said I still love him and to call me when he leaves her. I would be there for him, but otherwise do not call me until then. I feel I did the best job I could, but in the end my sanity was at stake and I needed some space. It's been three days and I miss him something awful, but I can't change his mind and I can't continue to have him live with her and talk to me everything 5 and 6 times a day and going to lunch once a week. I thought about letting her know about us but I can't be what I'm not and I don't want to hurt anyone. Him or anyone else.
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Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 444
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Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 444 |
tawny, I feel your pain. My wife left about 6 weeks ago. She hung around our town till last week. I learned this week that she is in OM's town. I too couln't take it any more. She was talking to OM every day and it got to the point I couldn't or wouldn't tolerate the disrespectful behavior so I went to plan B. I ahven't talked to her since last week when I answered the phone at my son's place. The conversation was short and sweet. Since then nothing. Everyone has their own tolerance for pain. I still miss her and have wanted to call her but that would defeat the purpose of Plan B so I haven't and I don't plan to. Keep busy and hang on.
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Joined: Sep 2001
Posts: 5,733
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Joined: Sep 2001
Posts: 5,733 |
</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by tawny:
<strong>I thought about letting her know about us but I can't be what I'm not and I don't want to hurt anyone. Him or anyone else. </strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">You are enabling him ... I would tell OW. Let OW LB'ed him .... I would send a copy of that message (plan B) to OW.
GO DARK !.
-rh-
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Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 28
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Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 28 |
Hard day today. Tried to stay busy. I loved talking to him. Every day, several times a day. How do you fill that up? Why is it so hard to love someone?
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