On another thread, I posted about our counsellor.
The counsellor that I saw separately and then WH and I had a joint session. Then on Thursday, she saw WH by himself for the first time. WH called after and when I asked him how it went, he was so smug because the counsellor told WH to seek legal counsel for divorce and financial implications.
Why would I go to a counsellor that advocates walking away from the marriage rather than trying to solve our issues first? I do have an IC that I will continue to see for my own mental health.
The counsellor called me the next day. I asked her to confirm that she had advised WH to see a lawyer about a divorce. She said she could not as that was confidential. I told her that from what WH said, even though she has only seen him once alone and once with me that she is not supporting the sanctity of our marriage and instead of giving us the tools to work on our problems she is enabling him to walk away without trying. She said she cannot work with us as a couple as my goals were so different than WHs.
Since she only saw him a total of twice, what possible justification could there be for that advice? I am trying to be fair but I just don't see it.
This is Crisis Counselling as WHs decision to leave our M is just over a month old! She knows that he is in crisis mode so isn't thinking clearly. And, any decisions that are made in this reactionary mode are not well thought out.
I was upfront in my individual session that my goal was to work on our communication problems, our issues AND to stay married. IF AT ALL POSSIBLE. I also shared my concerns about his mental state and some of the irrational behaviour. Which he also displayed in our joint session, BTW.
It is so obvious that both of us need to take a deep breath and deal with our issues before we move on.
I think her advise and her opinions are contrary to what a professional counsellor should be doing.
I would like to complain about this to her superiors. How many other marriages has she destroyed by this kind of advise? I am a fighter (UH DUH! Look at my sig) so I am not scared to confront someone on their actions. But, there are a lot of people that aren't like that and might have trusted her advise as the only solution! How horrible is that? <img border="0" alt="[Teary]" title="" src="graemlins/teary.gif" />
What do you think?
Edited for spelling and subject <img border="0" title="" alt="[Roll Eyes]" src="images/icons/rolleyes.gif" />
<small>[ November 29, 2004, 11:27 AM: Message edited by: fightingalone-again ]</small>
