hello all, i am struggling a little today and just needed to talk. it is 7.5 weeks since DD and NC. on some days it seems like years ago, and some days it seems like yesterday. what a ride! it seems like most of you are still having SF, but that is not the case here. the WW[ i don't know if that is the correct term for her ,since she has had NC] and i get along fine as friends,roomates and co-parents, but she shows me NO affection at all. we have never been the kind of couple to make love 2-3 times a week, but it has been so long, i am starting to feel real uncomfortable about it. since her A started in june 03, we have had sex 2 times. over a year ago. i didn't know or suspect anything about the A, so since she acted like she was not interested in sex, ithought " if we ever have sex again, she will have to start it". boy, did i show her. she has never had a real active sex drive,that's why i didn't suspect any thing. any she works out of the home, and is always home. i always knew where she was at.[ or so i thought]. anyway she met up w/ a old high school friend on classmates.com, and started the EA[?] on the computer. they did manage to meet together physically 3-4 times. the good thing here is he is in fla. and we are in kansas. i don't know how long it will take her to come around, and i don't know how long i can go on. we are in MC and she still says she is willing to try, tho she has never said that she "wants" to. i guess if she didn't want to, she wouldn't go to MC with me. who knows? i do love this lady and keep telling myself that i will keep trying to do a good plan a. there is a singer named dido who had a song out recently called "white flag" i have taken this song as my motto, and have even told my wife that. the chorus "i will go down with this ship, i won't raise my hands up and surrender, there will be NO white flag above my door, i'm in love, and alway's will be" thanks for listening to the ramblings of a lovesick fool, arjdad

Its amazing how many times Ive heard that song and yet, I never heard that song before. I just got it and listened to it, wow. As far as rambling, welcome aboard, I tend to do that alot lately, even to myself.


PS.......Stupid rollercoaster

gadgetolds thanks for the reply. it is a pretty appropriate song don't youthink? i don't know your whole story, but i am sorry to have to meet you this way. it seems we have something terrible in common. definately being here able to ramble and whine with others in the same boat as me has been good therapy. it helps to hear from others. hopefully we will all be able to save our M and be able to look back and remember our friends we "met" who helped us thru. if i ever get to that point, i hope to be able to help newbies here much like some of the veterans now have helped me. rambling again, sorry, arjdad

Hello......my name is TravellinMan......and I am a whiner...... <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

I agree with you arjdad, I feel like I am such a newbie that all I do is seek help or vent here, and can't offer any advice. Maybe one day I will be able to "pay it forward"....

TM

TM, i agree that i definately don't feel like i should give advice at this point. hopefully someday, we will be the "old timers" here with a success story to help encourage others. altho i hope that some of the veterans that are here now will still be then. i can't imagine being able to help someone as much as some of them have helped me. [suzet*,bob pure, believer,orchid,pepperband, chackler, and snowbelle to name a few] anyway whenever you feel the need to whine or vent, feel free. arjdad