Well after this last night I come home from work this morning to my WW hugging and kissing me. She says "good morning beautiful". Could she be plan A-ing me? Has that ever happened? I doubt she is, but got to admit it seems suspicious that she is trying to be nice to me all of the sudden.

MIF?

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by MIF?:
<strong> Well after this last night I come home from work this morning to my WW hugging and kissing me. She says "good morning beautiful". Could she be plan A-ing me? Has that ever happened? I doubt she is, but got to admit it seems suspicious that she is trying to be nice to me all of the sudden.

MIF? </strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Well, I would expect this to happen, no real big suprise. I also suspect you will be back in "recovery" soon. That is great, if that is what you choose to do here. This whole situation has already been scripted a thousand times over here.

Goodluck, FIM.

What I don't understand is that you have filed for divorce. This kind of action is very very serious, and not one that should be removed at a whim, or because your WW is being "nice and lovey". I think you were premature in filing for divorce. You clearly have a lot of "reserve" left for your WW. Don't file a divorce as a threat...There can not be a more disastrous outcome.

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by lemonman:
Don't file a divorce as a threat...There can not be a more disastrous outcome.</font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">I agree.

Do you want a divorce?

Pep

MIF,

Read your postings.

My STBX also lurks here. I have changed my ID 4 times and finally said screw it.

My STBX is talking like she is Plan A'ing.
Writing her emails like she is Plan A'ing. However she is acting Like she is Plan Affairing, and Plan B*llsh*tting.

Your WW is accusing you of your own affair. SHe is projecting her own adulturous behavior on you. My STBX is doing the same thing. It is bizarre to read your posts. She thinks everyone must be a liar and a cheat because she is.

However, I am living apart from my STBX. And happy about it too.
Another difference is your WW comes up and gives you a hug. My STBX "tells" me to give her a hug. Not likely given her actions.

My STBX's e-mails have begun to stop attacking me. However, she won't give me a suit that I still have at the house, she won't give me cake pans to bake for my children. (I'm not even sure she knows what the pans are for, but she is real good with a cell phone and webcam) She won't let me have Christmas lights, (she hasn't put up any either). So I don't feel like I'm being plan A'd. I feel that she is full of words and not actions.

I'm not here to try to burst a balloon. You obviously are still trying to preserve your marriage. Your WW may be scared that you "may" have found someone else to meet your needs. She does not want your needs met by anyone, she wants you waiting for her.

And I know how good it feels to get some of those needs met when they have been withheld for months and years.

As soon as she feels secure that you are not "moving on" she will go right back to her ways.

JMHO

Good luck.

mif...the posts you made about your flirting did their job...she's reacting to the 'news' that you were out there flirting..probably, hit her between the eyes that while she's out chasing her fantasy's with OM, you won't be sitting there waiting pining for her.

Just be very careful with this....just because she had her jealous bone jarred doesn't mean she has turned a miracle corner and will give up the OM.

..although i think showing her a bit of what her reality will be if you do move on and start dating again is a very good thing...who knows..maybe that's all she needed...i really do hope so, and i wish you all the luck..

DC, we are of the same opinion. But I don't think it is going to chase her away from OM. It just makes my STBX more sneaky.

Heck, my STBX told me to move out 3 times a day for 6 months. Called the cops on me for what the cops said was petty BS. And finally got the Judge to order out of the house. Now, a month later she "miraculously" woke up. She was still in contact with OM even after I left.

STBX has done this before. Felt me out to see if I was waiting around and then gave me the stiff arm if she thought I was. I am so over all that crap.

MIF, be careful. It is the holiday's too.

Well, the thing is right now my love bank for her is depleted. I am all for this divorce at this point. I guess, if she did start making a real serious attempt at making this marriage work my love bank would fill back up and we may be able save this yet, but like I said, at this point I don't want to save this anymore.

Lemonman,
I know it was a bit premature and drastic to file, but I don't regret it at this point. As of last Sat. I am satisfied I did the right thing.

Pep,
Do I want a divorce? Yes, as of Sat. 12-18-04 I truly do.

Tom Joad,
I am not still trying to preserve my marriage. As of 12-18-04 I made the decision that my marriage was over and I have accepted that and am content with that. I told my WW that I was no longer going to exert any energy trying to save this marriage, my energy was going to be focused on getting my future going in the right direction. I also am not getting my needs met by another woman. All I did was flirt with a cute waitress. No date, no phone number from her, just a little innocent flirting. Well, a lot of innocent flirting.

DC,
My posts about my flirting was not meant to get her jealous. I had given up on my marriage at that point and came here to tell the story of how I finally came to that conclusion. Yes, it did help to get out and stop pining for my WW and see there are other women out there.

Tom Joad,
Yes, my wife filed to have me court ordered out of the house. I imagine that should be happening any time now. She has a meeting with her attorney as I type this and I expect one of the items to be taken care of will be her signing the paperwork.

I guess, I should start calling my WW my STBX, except WW is easier to type.

MIF?

<small>[ December 22, 2004, 01:01 PM: Message edited by: MIF? ]</small>

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by MIF?:

Pep,
Do I want a divorce? Yes, as of Sat. 12-18-04 I truly do.

</font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">In that case, it does not matter if STBXW is "Plan-A-ing" you ... whatever.

Just be polite.

Pep

I understand. I just wondered if that was something that was common. I hadn't heard of the WS plan A-ing once the BS took some sort of action, whether it be plan B or plan D.