Just a though on the doctor's suicide. He probably suffered from exceptionality. I heard a suicide prevention expert speak on that and he classified it as one of the causes of suicide. Boiled down it's feeling the pressure to be exceptional all the time and the bar just keeps getting higher.

Not one human on this planet no matter how skilled or talented they are can be exceptional all the time. It's just a trap of the mind and is probably the why behind suicides where they seem to be at the top of their career or have everything.

The speaker adviced us all to let ourselves and our children be normal and be okay with that sometimes.

Just thoughts,

Tiggy

<small>[ December 28, 2004, 11:58 PM: Message edited by: Tiggy ]</small>

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by lemonman:
<strong> [QUOTE] I hope you can post him off the ledge, but in reality, if hi is gonna fo it, stropping him from this message foruims may be hard, but $hit, I will try wioth you if you yhink it willwork. </strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Not sure what you are suggesting here - what do you have in mind?

Just a comment to those who would judge someone who commits or attempts suicide or has suicidal thoughts or ideations as selfish -- you should consider yourself fortunate that you have never been there. Do not judge what you do not and cannot understand. You cannot understand unless you have been there.

Isatyd,

That is sooooo true.

I have learned--

That love doesn't stop someone to suicide---every person who completes suicide leaves survivors and people that care.

Guilt doesn't stop a suicide. People who are suicidal are already riddled with their own self judgement and have convinced themselves that everyone would be better off without them. Not true of course.

Belief in hell doesn't stop them. If it did, the many, many people who believe in God wouldn't take their own lives.

Having children doesn't stop them--they also believe that their children don't want/need/love them and they too would be better off without them.

Suicidal depression is a real thing and I have come to see it as a monster of sorts that screams lies at you constantly. I remember feeling like I was standing in front of one of those six foot speakers and this monster was screaming that everyone would be better off without me, that it was all gone (my first marriage), the pain was too great, it wouldn't get better. It was a dark hour indeed in my life.

Dalton I hope you are still lurking about here reading. I can't sleep. Warm thoughts from Oregon coming your way Dalton.

Tiggy

I just read in the news that Dr. Webb had a rare cancer - fibrosarcoma - in 2002. So his suicide may be related to that. Somehow it made me feel somewhat better. At least it is an explanation.

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by believer:
<strong> I just read in the news that Dr. Webb had a rare cancer - fibrosarcoma - in 2002. So his suicide may be related to that. Somehow it made me feel somewhat better. At least it is an explanation. </strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Explanation????? Wow, I can't say that I would ever draw the conclusion that having fibrosarcoma would lead to suicide and more importanly make me feel better about it.

To clarify, why would it matter if Dr webb committed suicide becasue he was depressed over losing a 2 year old in the OR vs. having a personal sickness.

Whatever I guess.

<small>[ December 29, 2004, 05:43 PM: Message edited by: lemonman ]</small>

You're right Lemonman - feeling better is not the word. The whole thing is depressing.

What exactly is that cancer?

What is the prognosis?

What is the treatment?

What are the permanent effects of successful treatment?

How does it affect you (before death) if you don't get it treated?

Maybe the answers to these questions had something to do with what the good doctor did?

Regardless of the reason "why" someone takes their own life, the heartache for those left behind doesn't end. And, how unfortunate to not be able to "save" one's self. I heard it said like this:
How sad it is to live life with only the blinders that allow you to see just the raging waterfall in front of you, and not letting you view the peaceful meadow you are standing in.

It's a sad day for us all, I think. LM, I'm sorry for your personal loss.

I had to let go of the *why* question myself with my ex. There were too many possible answers and many people thought it was because of his evil ex-wife--oh yeah that was me.

IMO, it really boils down to that person made a choice. You can find all kinds of *reasons* why people commit suicide and most other people in that same situation don't suicide.

I know many cancer survivors and victims who haven't completed suicide. Buried all of my grandparents after they died from cancer and they were never suicidal. I just have to look at this board and see tons of people who have gone through infidelity on either side who haven't suicided.

There is something deeper going on here.

We try to find answers because it scares us. It doesn't make sense. In the end, I decided that I would never know the whole reason my first husband shot himself. I can speculate until I am blue in the face and I still will never know exactly why.

And it is a hard question to let go of but really I had to to survive. I would have gone crazy by now if I was still wondering.

Just thoughts,
Tiggy