I truly consider myself a MB SUCCESS STORY. Even if my FWH becomes a WH again, I've grown immensely from my struggles over the past two years.
I really feel for lots of you here on the forum. A lot of you seem to feel so hopeless and want to give up. I want to encourage you to really try this system. I am biased because it worked for me. It may not be the solution for you. However, it certainly worked for me. With the help of the wonderful folks on this forum, counseling from Steve Harley and my faith in the LORD who was there in my darkest hours, I have made it. We have made it!
My situation was awful. My FWH was "in love" with the OW. Their A had gone on for almost two years when I discovered them in a motel on 12/31/02. He answered the door in his boxers. He soon made plans to leave me. Moved out two months later. Then there were two false recoveries, physical altercations and a zillion other traumatic experiences and encounters... Weekends away with the OW, him telling me "I've never loved you" and "It's all over". He moved in with the OW with plans of starting a life with her and her daughter,in the ghetto. He was a well-known successful businessman in our community. AWFUL! AWFUL! AWFUL!!
I did my STRONG PLAN A and then PLAN B. During PLAN B, I sold our "dream house" we designed in one day with all plans of moving into a teeny house just for me and our son. He then begged to reconcile, quoting my PLAN B letter. However, he almost went back to her one more time... AWFUL!!
Now a full two years later... He is truly himself again and even better. He is insistent about being open and honest with me. He is loving and affectionate. I have 10 love notes posted on my office bulletin board right now as well as two plants and two recent miniature Xmas trees on my desk. One has a teddy bear wrapped around it.
I wish you guys would persevere and not give up or feel that it is hopeless. I know that I must have felt and acted that way. I want you to know that the WS has to first really begin to value you again in PLAN A and then through PLAN B believe that they will lose you. This is it in a nutshell.
I made the decision TO WORK on MY MARRIAGE. If it ended, I wanted to know that I did everything that I could do to help our problems heal. Most importantly, though, I have gained a love for myself. I really believe that if my H leaves me now that it will be a major loss for him. I am the best wife, mother and person that I can be. THAT HAS BEEN MY PLAN since my first conversation with STEVE HARLEY in JANUARY 03.
MY NEW YEARS BLESSINGS TO ALL OF YOU!!!!
<small>[ January 03, 2005, 02:37 PM: Message edited by: mimi1254 ]</small>
