</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by holiday:
<strong>Prosectution cut her a deal!!!</strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">What was her crime?

Being stupid? Having poor judgement? Having questionable values?

I admit I didn't know she had children by unknown fathers. But this has nothing to do with the trial or her (apparently) unwitting participation with the pond scum.

If your point is that she knowingly participated in the murder, where's the evidence? You're saying that she could have been prosecuted based on admissable evidence, yet wasn't because of some immunity arrangement in order to testify against him? I would expect that that would have to be public information.

WAT

***I think many of you are displacing your feelings towards your OW on Amber Frey. Some of your posts are mighty presumptious and judgemental. Get a grip here please.***

My post was (largely) just a list of facts.

I think people are angry and annoyed here because Amber is being held up as some sort of victim and heroine, when in truth she is just another OW who never cared who got hurt as long as she got her fun and attention from her married man.

Amber put herself into this situation. She knew virtually nothing about Scott Peterson before jumping into bed with him except that he was nice-looking and gave her some attention. The woman let him pick her child at day care, for pete's sake, knowing hardly anything about him. That does NOT make her a victim.

Then, after having gotten mixed up with someone she hardly knew, she finds out he's a sociopathic liar who may have killed his wife. Amber panics and goes to the police. The police get her to agree to tape her phone calls to said sociopath, because if she does they might be able to protect her from him. If she doesn't, it's her problem. That does NOT make her a heroine. I don't see where she had much choice.

Sorry, no sympathy here for someone that stupid and selfish. Scotty P. was not her first married man. Go away, Amber. Just be glad you're still alive.
Mulan

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by Mulan:
<strong>I think people are angry and annoyed here because Amber is being held up as some sort of victim and heroine, when in truth she is just another OW who never cared who got hurt as long as she got her fun and attention from her married man.

Amber put herself into this situation. She knew virtually nothing about Scott Peterson before jumping into bed with him except that he was nice-looking and gave her some attention.</strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Did knowing "virtually nothing" include not knowing he was married? If so, how do you justify your first statement I quoted?

WAT

<small>[ January 04, 2005, 12:24 PM: Message edited by: worthatry ]</small>

Bravo Mulan.
She did the right thing going to the police.
She has obviously made a lot of bad choices before this and after <img border="0" title="" alt="[Roll Eyes]" src="images/icons/rolleyes.gif" /> .

And, that is not based on the OW in my case. That is fact, by her own admission of her actions in court. Not admitting to bad choices by her, but admitting to behavior that some find "O.K." and some find "sleazy". Sign me up under #2.

I guess she can use the money to support her bad choices.

<small>[ January 04, 2005, 12:28 PM: Message edited by: marriedandlonely ]</small>

~I think many of you are displacing your feelings towards your OW on Amber Frey. Some of your posts are mighty presumptious and judgemental. Get a grip here please.~

Sorry this all sounds so "presumptious and judgemental" and it is, but it just shows that society, "we the people" are continually made to feel we need to accept the poor OW, may I say bluntly, "bull s..t". She may have not been an accomplice to murder, but she wanted to wash her hands clean "before being implimented" in a crime.

~I think many of you are displacing your feelings towards your OW on Amber Frey. Some of your posts are mighty presumptious and judgemental. Get a grip here please.~

Sorry this all sounds so "presumptious and judgemental" and it is, but it just shows that society, "we the people" are continually made to feel we need to accept the poor OW, may I say bluntly, "bull s..t". She may have not been an accomplice to murder, but she wanted to wash her hands clean "before being implimented" in a crime.

~I think many of you are displacing your feelings towards your OW on Amber Frey. Some of your posts are mighty presumptious and judgemental. Get a grip here please.~

Sorry this all sounds so "presumptious and judgemental" and it is, but it just shows that society, "we the people" are continually made to feel we need to accept the poor OW, may I say bluntly, "bull s..t". She may have not been an accomplice to murder, but she wanted to wash her hands clean "before being implimented" in a crime. Believe me, my feelings are being displaced...they are being placed.

~I think many of you are displacing your feelings towards your OW on Amber Frey. Some of your posts are mighty presumptious and judgemental. Get a grip here please.~

Sorry this all sounds so "presumptious and judgemental" and it is, but it just shows that society, "we the people" are continually made to feel we need to accept the poor OW, may I say bluntly, "bull s..t". She may have not been an accomplice to murder, but she wanted to wash her hands clean "before being implimented" in a crime. Believe me, my feelings are not being displaced...they are being placed.

Very sorry...computer did something crazy...I just wanted to add and correct one sentence...
My feelings were not being displaced, they were being placed.

***Did knowing "virtually nothing" include not knowing he was married?***

Amber never got his home phone number -- only his cell.

He never invited her back to "his place" -- they met at hotels.

He was only available at odd and intermittent times -- he was not free to see her any day or any time.

All of these things are screaming red flags that the guy is either married or has a live-in girlfriend. No 21st century woman is that stupid, especially one with Amber's past (i.e. an OC.) If Amber ignored the warning signs, it's because she didn't care. That's why I have no sympathy for her.

Just because a guy who behaves this way says, "Oh, but I'm not married," it was okay for her to ignore overwhelming evidence to the contrary? Of course not. That's like finding a wad of money in an alley behind a bank and then saying, "But gee, it never occured to me that it might be stolen!"

Amber was selfish and stupid. She endangered herself and her child and helped ruin someone else's marriage. Same old thing we see here every day -- except that her MM just happened to also be a sociopath capable of murder.

***If so, how do you justify your first statement I quoted?***
WAT

Not sure what you mean here -- you may have me confused with another poster. If you want to post again, I'll try to clarify.

I will say, though, that while I don't believe Amber had anything to do with the actual murder of Laci Peterson, Amber has no one to blame for her predicament but herself. If she'd had half a brain or an ounce of self-respect, she would never have gone near a guy who behaved like Scott Peterson did. But as I said before, he was not her first MM.
Mulan

This is a useless thread.

How is it helping anyone build their own marriage?

I think too many LOVE to bash someone who's not here to defend themselves.

I doubt Amber Frey gives a flip what any of you think of her.

We all know how you feel about adultery. She ain't the only sinner in this world.

BTW, Gossip is also a sin...and this thread doesn't amount to much more than that.

Low

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by LowOrbit:
<strong> This is a useless thread.


I think too many LOVE to bash someone who's not here to defend themselves.


Low </strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Good post, ENOUGH SAID !!!!

I truly apologize that the last two posts took it as bashing or gossip.
I thought this forum was open to feelings.
I was hoping to inspire a WS to think twice or at least once.

Holiday,

I am most certain that most WS or FWS have thought far more than twice about what they've done by the time they start reading here.

Reminding them that they are scum of the earth, however indirectly, doesn't help them or their BS heal.

Although no one expects the BS to speak in glowing terms about the OP, it's quite common for the WS here to think that what is said about the OP is what is thought about them. We have a tendency to identify ourselves with the OP because they were our partner in crime.

How can you say you hate them so badly for what they've done without implying that you hate your FWS as well.

Focus on healing. Focus on specific behaviors. Focus on your relationship with your spouse.

All else is really not relevant.

Low

~How can you say you hate them so badly for what they've done without implying that you hate your FWS as well.~
I never used nor would I ues the word "hate", (terrible word) towards any WS or OP. Or actually about anyone. "My Mother taught me that".
Did I make you feel like the "scum of the earth?" with any of my statements? If so I am very sorry.
I don't feel FWS's are "the scum of the earth".
Thank you for your input, but I'm not quite understanding why you are feeling the need to go so deep with this?
Sorry to have got you going...

While you never used the term 'hate', yours and other responses clearly demonstrate that you not have her best welfare at heart.

I do believe lemonman was correct in that public situations like these allow us to tranfer feelings about our own situation into them.

Examine your reasons for wanting to hold Amber "accountable". Do you have her interest at heart or are you seeking personal satifaction in having her "pay up"

Amber's adopted system of morality had nothing to do with Laci's murder...period.

It would be exactly like me trying to say that my wife's poor job of need-meeting made her responsible for my affair. Do you see the parallel?

I think we've come a long way since the days of putting adulterers and fornicators in stocks. As destructive as it may be, I don't think this manner of "moral defect" is criminal.

Low

***How can you say you hate them so badly for what they've done without implying that you hate your FWS as well.***

Easy -- but I won't. It would only start a flame war and I'm not here to do that.

It does startle me to hear you say something like that, howver. There are many BS who are trying very hard to reconcile with their WS -- or who have been reconciled with them -- who hate the intruding OP with the fury of a thousand white-hot suns. I'm one of them, so I will not post to this thread anymore.
Mulan

Scott P is the WS. He took the final step and killed his family as a result of the A.

Amber F. is the OW. She helped push the A along. She may not have meant it to end in the death of his family but she was the one person who helped the A the most besides Scott. In this sense she is an accomplice to the A. Amber has R's with MM. It is not a lesson she has learned yet. Gotta wonder what it will take. Maybe the elastic in her garmets keep getting loose. Take a look at what she wore for 1 of her interviews. While it wasn't stripper material, she certainly likes to flaunt it to the limits. You'd think she would be more conservative since many already see her in the OW light.

IMHO, Amber likes the publicity and of course any $$ proceeds. The books is another example of it. She is also quite good at portraying the victim. Every attention and interview fuels her acting career. She will continue to do so similar to the gal in the 'blue dress'. LOL!!!

It is sad that both Amber and Scott are not remorseful enough. The deaths of Laci and her baby could actually happen to any of us here. There is a thin line that separates our WS/OPs from them. Look at what happened in Utah!??!?! So there are more out there willing to cross that line. Look who is holding their hands? <img border="0" title="" alt="[Eek!]" src="images/icons/shocked.gif" />

I think this was a useful thread. Not one where we transfer our anger from our own situations but rather one that opens our eyes and helps us see just how dangerous these types of situations really are.

JMHO,
L.

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by Orchid:
<strong> I think this was a useful thread. Not one where we transfer our anger from our own situations but rather one that opens our eyes and helps us see just how dangerous these types of situations really are.

JMHO,
L. </strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Yes, Orchid, you are right. This thread ofcourse had no displaced anger or judgements, but was just used an eye opener so that many BS and WS here can see just how "dangerous" these "situations" can be. Maybe this will deter future WS/OP from doing the same. We all should be really breathing a big sigh of relief that the thread was started so that we could all "gain" this insight. Thanks for pointing this out to us. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Roll Eyes]" src="images/icons/rolleyes.gif" />

LM

Thank you Orchid.
Reading your's and Mulan's posts have helped a great deal.
I have also read some posts by Lemonman and he sounds a bit...not on the surface, just bitter to the core.