I've only been in Plan A for 3 weeks and my WH is in the fog and doesn't understand why I've changed my behavior and become more loving, etc. He told me today he plans to find temporary housing so he can be away from me since he cannot reciprocate my affection and be able to clear his mind. Should I give him my Plan B letter or should I continue Plan A when he comes over from time to time?

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by hurtwifefromindy:
<strong>He told me today he plans to find temporary housing so he can be away from me since he cannot reciprocate my affection and be able to clear his mind.</strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Yea, right. You know the real reason, right?

I believe the Plan B question hinges on whether you have demonstrated your Plan A improvements AND whether you have completed exposure.

In my view, you should enter Plan B as soon as you accomplish these things AND when a physical separation has occurred. Please get add'l views.

Have you made financial arrangements for this "sabatical"? <img border="0" title="" alt="[Roll Eyes]" src="images/icons/rolleyes.gif" />

Do you own or rent, whose name is on the mortgage/lease, who pays bills, etc., etc., etc.

Going thru these arrangements has to be done before Plan B to avoid communication on it afterwards.

"I need my space to decide what to do." translation ---> "I need to give my affair easier access, with less restraints."

Have you exposed the affair to everyone who matters?

Has your husband seen the very best WIFE possible for the past 3 weeks?

I think 3 weeks is a little short. I might Plan A some more after he moves out. Invite him over for delicious meals, dates for coffee, etc. BUT, if he moves out and you are Plan Aing a few more weeks ... do not be 100% available to him... create some mystery of where you are going ... and be excessively cheerful as well. Throw him some doubt that you will wait patiently forever. And leave NO DOUBT that you are beautiful, talented, loving, and sexy.

Make sure you embark on Plan B when he has a picture of the wonderful you in his mind. No LB's is especially important right now. NO whining, nagging, excessive "I love you" are out, just smiles, throw him some admiration and flirting these next few weeks. But.... be busy sometimes as well. If you meet him somewhere for coffee, show up dressed to kill ---> AND leave early because you have somewhere else you need to be "Oh, nothing big sweetie. Just meeting a friend." "Oh, of course it's not a man!!!" *wink* ~smile~ and hug him as you rush off.

Pep

<small>[ January 06, 2005, 09:36 AM: Message edited by: Pepperband ]</small>

I did reveal the affair before I started Plan A to his co-workers, the OW's parents and his closest family member, his brother. His brother has been trying to call him all December but he refuses to take his calls.

As far as Plan A, he definitely notices the changes although he says he doesn't know how permanent they are. "His analogy was there is a dog that bites everyone he sees and then that dog stops biting but who knows if the dog is going to bite again." I don't know if I should be offended by him referring to me as a dog. :-) or just his way of explaining things. We both agreed that only time could tell whether the changes were permanent.

I already drafted a Plan B letter (discussing financial arrangements - my contribution to our shared mortgage, utilities, etc) but I don't know if this is the appropriate time for it. I don't know if the A is still going on but I do know contact is still ongoing and the OW is discussing with him some things (details he won't say - I can only guess it's about their future together or not).

He has told me he continue to stay because he's comfortable and he feels sorry for me. This is why I feel I need to move to Plan B so if he does commit to the marriage it is because he loves me and not because he feels pressured to.
________
Original story - http://www.marriagebuilders.com/forum/ultimatebb.php?ubb=get_topic;f=37;t=034777#000000

double ditto what Pep said.

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by hurtwifefromindy:
<strong>As far as Plan A, he definitely notices the changes although he says he doesn't know how permanent they are.</strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Har, Har, Har - straight from the WS script. Translation = I don't want to believe the changes are permanent because if they are, my excuses for an affair evaporate.

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by hurtwifefromindy:
<strong>(discussing financial arrangements - my contribution to our shared mortgage, utilities, etc) but I don't know if this is the appropriate time for it.</strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Before he moves out IS the appropriate time for it. The reality of doing this is a consequence of his decision. He should not be allowed to "move out" before accomplishing this. Insist on it, in a loving way. "Honey, before you go any further on your plan to move out, we should determine who's going to pay for what and stuff, don't you think, Dear? This will prevent any surprises!"

WAT

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">He has told me he continue to stay because he's comfortable and he feels sorry for me.</font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">WOW ... what a marroon! He needs to feel some DIScomfort via Plan B. Just wait a little longer to make some changes in your Plan A.

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">This is why I feel I need to move to Plan B so if he does commit to the marriage it is because he loves me and not because he feels pressured to.</font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">I agree with ya!

Planning and timing are crutial to an effective Plan B.

I think you should ramp Plan A up for a few weeks. Make him interested in what the hell is going on with you.

Cook great meals. DIFFERENT than your usual.
Be fun to be with. Smile a lot. Let him catch you laughing with other people.
Great to look at. Change something about your look. Hair color?
Smell sexy. New scent, new soap, some scent he's not used to.
Buy some new CDs and listen to a different kind of music. Dance in the kitchen. Get some salsa music.

Brew some exotic coffee ... and serve it with whipped cream... "Oh, just thought I'd try this java for a change."

Pep
________

I am almost always against plan A done in reaction to someone moving out..

smacks to much of you hurt me...
I will hurt you back..

much more difficult..
not for the weak of heart or stomach are those that even assist within plan with the WS moving out...

not over the top help..
but gathering a box or two...
giving them something they didn't think they'd need...
there own plunger for some strange comes to mind... <img border="0" title="" alt="[Razz]" src="images/icons/tongue.gif" />

if you can you should plan A even post move out day...with as pep says...some independance and mystery...

Cook great meals. DIFFERENT than your usual.
Be fun to be with. Smile a lot. Let him catch you laughing with other people.
Great to look at. Change something about your look. Hair color?
Smell sexy. New scent, new soap, some scent he's not used to.
Buy some new CDs and listen to a different kind of music. Dance in the kitchen. Get some salsa music.

Brew some exotic coffee ... and serve it with whipped cream... "Oh, just thought I'd try this java for a change."


OH MY GOD PEP...you SOUND LIKE ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

did you do something different with your hair?? <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

also post your plan b letter here...
ARK

The WSes follow a script.

My FWH did the same as yours. He eventually moved out in order to have increased time with and access to the OW.

I did a strong PLAN A with all the stuff the others have talked about so that when I did do PLAN B all he had was her and he was left with memories of my PLAN A.

I will add that it's important for him to believe that your PLAN A changes are real. Although he may try to provoke you to change back in order to justify his A, stay true to YOUR PLAN. I continue to do MY PLAN to this day.

I agree that it is too early for PLAN B but be ready for it. Remember when you GO DARK, he needs to miss you and realize that the OW now has to meet all of his needs. She will fail because she does not have A PLAN. Don't read this to mean that this is about a competition with her. You are on a different level than she is. You are HIS WIFE! She is a figment of his imagination, a fantasy that she will have to continue to try to create. YOU ARE REAL, HIS ROCK, HIS LOCK ON REALITY. STAND STRONG AND DO WHAT YOU HAVE TO DO TO FIGHT FOR YOUR MARRIAGE!

BTW, don't help him with those financial arrangements. Let him try to figure that out on his own. To protect yourself, go to see your own attorney to learn more about your legal rights in this regard. Don't let him fool you into thinking he's leaving to clear his mind. He's leaving to be adulterous. He is abandoning you for her at this point. Standing up for your rights will gain his respect for you. That's a good thing!

<small>[ January 06, 2005, 03:18 PM: Message edited by: mimi1254 ]</small>

So I was thinking of moving forward with Plan A based on your comments, but I just found out that my WH just got an influx of money (I have no idea where from) to our joint account (he doesn't know I see the statements. Just in time for him to find a new place and pay for it. And just as it was deposited, it was withdrawn. I really don't know what to say but it seems like the A is still going on.

Here's my Plan B letter with much help from the letters consolidated on this site...
____________________
Dear WH,

I apologize to you for my part in creating an environment that helped make your affair with OW possible. I foolishly pursued my career and other selfish needs without understanding my responsibility to meet your most important emotional needs. I took you for granted - the one thing you asked me not to do when you left your last girlfriend when we were dating and committed yourself 100% to me. I rejected you sexually and was too independent instead of focusing on our partnership. I tried to control you and nitpick everything you did. When we were dating, I focused my attention on you, considered your feelings and did things to make our relationship a inviting place for you but when we got married, my priorities shifted and I settled into the security marriage provided even though I was not nurturing it to be everlasting. I did not understand what it took to have a successful and fulfilling relationship, or how to love unconditionally. I was not there for you when you needed me the most, and now we are both suffering for my mistake.

I have changed my priorities and even though you feel they are superficial I am making them permanent and improving myself and my life. I am a better person. I make mistakes every day, but everyday I strive to be the best person I can be and the best wife I can be to you. I cannot sit here today and say that I know all that I need to know about relationships but I can, however, honestly say that I have learned a lot about honoring, cherishing and companionship. I want to learn even more about how to be a supportive and loving wife. The type of woman that I hope you would be proud to call your wife; the same pride I felt so many times when I called you my husband.

I married you for life and I want to stay married to you. I am willing to avoid the mistakes I've made in the past and create a new life for both of us that will meet your needs. I have been trying and am willing to continue to do what it takes to be the wife you've always wanted and to address the things I did wrong in the marriage. Since December 2004, I've been trying to give you hope for the marriage by learning how to be a better wife to you and a better person overall. To give you hope that you could return to a marriage that you wanted, and for us to build our family together, but the past few months have been the most difficult time of my life. I cannot continue until you end your relationship with OW once and for all. The affair/neglect/rejection/insensitivity is so painful for me that it will destroy the love I have for you. In order to protect those feelings I must end all contact with you and avoid seeing you or talking to you. To this end I respect your decision to leave and I feel it is best that you find another place to stay while I stay in our home. WH, please understand that this is very difficult and not meant to punish you or threaten you with any ultimatum but rather to protect my feelings for you and our chances at a real reconciliation. I know that I risk loosing you forever, but I cannot continue to see you without putting pressure on you to make a decision and I don't want to make any demands on you. If you choose to come back and work on our marriage, I want to know that you have done it because you love me and not because you have felt pressured into doing it or because you feel sorry for me.

I ask you to respect my decision to separate from you in this way. You must know about the torturous pain and suffering I have endured because of your relationship with OW and I simply cannot be with you any longer, knowing that you are with her. I still love you but I cannot see you under these conditions.

You have chosen to spend time with this specific woman and possibly others. You have told me you are still in contact with OW, care deeply for her and that I cannot stop you from seeing her. I do not condone it, or like it, but have no choice. You are the only person who can make choices for you and I will respect your decision. I hope that you will be happy in whatever you chose and that you find peace. You are my friend, my lover and my husband. I only want true happiness for you and do not wish any harm or ill to you.

As soon as you are willing to permanently separate from OW, demonstrate it in a credible way and are willing to follow measures to ensure total and permanent separation and most of all committed to me and our relationship, I will be willing to discuss our future together. I want us to be able to rebuild our marriage some day. I want us to be able to meet each other's emotional needs and to avoid doing anything to hurt each other. We need to build a new lifestyle in which everything we do makes us both happy. Then there will never again be a reason for us to separate. I want to be your best friend, someone who is always there for you when you need me. And I want you as my best friend. I want us to be a team, and restore our marriage together. I want you to know that no matter how bad the past was, no matter how ugly the moments have been, we can get past it. With God's help, our true healing can begin. Healthy relationships are based on honesty, openness and mutual respect and care for the other's well-being.

I loved you when we married and I continue to love you right up to this day. You are the only person I have allowed myself to love so deeply and are the only person I will continue to love until we reach a resolution whatever the outcome may be.

I have estimated the following is my share of the expenses until we have resolved this issue - $x (mortgage and utilities). I have discontinued automatic deduction for your student loan and the statements where you can provide payments is sent by mail each month to our current address. I will also remove your account from sharing my Sprint PCS plan at your request. Please send me an email with the work address where I can send my check along with your mail. If you need access to the house, please send me an email so I can arrange to have the house available to you at a time when I am not there. In an emergency, you can reach me through email at x.

I love you WH and you will always be very special to me. I look back through our life and I chose now to only remember the good times and learn from the bad. I am trying to forgive whatever pain you have caused me and hope that in time you will forgive me too. I hope we will be together again one day and find the key to each other's everlasting happiness.

Your loving wife,
BS
____________________

Your situation sounds similar to mine so let me share my story with you to see if it helps. Three weeks after D-day my husband moved out to his Moms house. I was devistated but it also helped. After D-day he was so cold and unfeeling towards me, he had already moved out mentally. The constant rejection was unbearable. Plus I was pregnant at the time with our first child. After he moved out Plan A was a lot easier for me, in that I didn't have to face the constant hurt and rejection so I wasn't operating on just pain. I used this time to really work on myself and become the type of person and mother that I wanted to be. And he noticed.

I also did not make myself available to him all the time. When he would e-mail I wouldn't always respond, at least not right away. If he came over unannounced and I already had plans I would do what I had planned. Plus I went away on a few trips to visit family out of town. I made sure to let him know what a great time I had, so he would see that I was doing fine without him.

Fast forward to today and he has moved home and we are getting along great. He even told me he loved me last week for the first time since D-day. No SF yet but that's because the doctor hasn't cleared me for that yet! We'll see what happens after I go to the doctors in two weeks! We are both off of work to take care of the baby so we are spending all our time together.

So Plan A is possible after he moved out, in some ways a lot easier. In my opinion 3 weeks of Plan A isn't long enough. Hope this helps, feel free to ask any questions. Good luck to you.

Still part of the WH script. They do secret stuff with money. I found out that my FWH saved lots of money and had secret bank accounts. Plus, he bought a condo which we are now renting out. He really did live in it TEMPORARILY.

I'm so sorry that you have to go through this. The A has made him lose control. It's all about trying to live out his fantasy with the OW.

IMHO, the most important thing for you to do right now is to consult with an attorney. Then, you need to have a talk with your WH to let him know that you are aware of what he has done. Also, at the same time, let him know that you want to work on your marriage, that your changes are not temporary and that you do not want him to move out. This may not keep him from doing so but it will allow you to restate your position.

I still do not think it is time for PLAN B. PLAN A for as long as possible. Maybe it will take him some time to move out. It took my FWH about 2 months to move out after D-Day which gave me plenty of time to continue with MY PLAN A.

Well I came home last night and he was gone along with some of his clothes. He is staying at an Extended Stay.

I didn't talk to him at all last night and this morning he's been calling my cell and home number.

I'm going to try Plan A but not being available to him all the time. He's been calling all morning (voicemessages say to make sure I was all right). I have not answered his calls yet. When I came home I felt so alone that I feel like I want to go to Plan B to give him a taste of his own medicine. But I guess that may hurt me more in the end. I just can't stop thinking of how the OW must be feeling victorious that he left me and what's going on with them now.

kloe72, how long did your husband move out for and good luck with the baby?

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">I'm going to try Plan A but not being available to him all the time. He's been calling all morning (voicemessages say to make sure I was all right). </font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Believe me, I know exactly how you are feeling. DEVASTATED!

However, PLAN A does involve talking to him and continuing to let him know that you care about him. I would suggest having the conversation that I mentioned in my previous post. It was recommended to me by Steve Harley himself when I was in your exact same position. You want to let him know that you want to work on the marriage.

Yes, the OW may think that she has won but she has not. She will win if you give up on your marriage. She is hoping that you will give up and is likely trying to convince him that you do not love him like she does.

HWFM - you're getting good advice.

I follow the logic for wanting to Plan A a bit longer so as the Plan B doesn't come across as "retaliation" for him moving out. But......... don't wait too long. No matter when you go to Plan B, your WS may feel it as your anger, childishness, immaturity, communication deficiency, etc., etc., etc. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Roll Eyes]" src="images/icons/rolleyes.gif" /> It will very likely be received negatively no matter when it comes. And, this forum is (has been) heavily populated by Plan B'ers who ultimately concluded they waited too long.

So, I do follow the logic of delaying, but I don't necessarily agree with it. The recommendations by Pep, ark, and mimi, above, can be very effective IF you can do them as described. But if you can't, take it from a guy - the sooner he feels that he no longer has control of his destiny, the sooner he will be affected - by Plan B. That said, Plan B is for YOU, not the WS. But the affect on the WS cannot be discounted.

I have some thought on your letter that I will share when I have some more time.

WAT

Speaking from the POV of my FWH, my PLAN B would not have been effective at all without a STRONG PLAN A. He had to really miss me during PLAN B. He missed the special memories that he had of me during PLAN A. I was also encouraged by Steve Harley to do PLAN A as long as possible I think because my FWH was such a cakeeater. He wanted me and the OW right from the start of the A's exposure.

I'm just hoping you don't get discouraged from doing PLAN A as long as possible. I think it's too early for you. It's important to get important messages over to him before you GO DARK!!

I Love you WAT but you were not a WS!!!

<small>[ January 07, 2005, 09:03 AM: Message edited by: mimi1254 ]</small>

Hi mimi!

Not only am I not a WS, I am also not married! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

Absolutely, a strong Plan A is the most important prerequisite for Plan B. Steve recommends folks stay in Plan A longer than his Dad does. Heck, I was in Plan A for a year.

Indy - or should we call her Mindy? - is the only one who knows how good her Plan A has been and is the only one who can detect when she's about drained. But when she's close to drained and the LBs can't be resisted, the "pristine" Plan A is already over and a perfect transition to Plan B cannot be achieved. This point is hard to predict even by the BS, much less so by us from a distance. This is why I also generally recommend sooner rather than later.

Hope you're well!

WAT

Just some notes about your Plan B letter...

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial"> I apologize to you for my part in creating an environment that helped make your affair with OW possible.

Apologize for your part in the unfulfilling M, not the A...

I foolishly pursued my career and other selfish needs without understanding my responsibility to meet your most important emotional needs. I took you for granted - the one thing you asked me not to do when you left your last girlfriend when we were dating and committed yourself 100% to me. I rejected you sexually and was too independent instead of focusing on our partnership. I tried to control you and nitpick everything you did. When we were dating, I focused my attention on you, considered your feelings and did things to make our relationship a inviting place for you but when we got married, my priorities shifted and I settled into the security marriage provided even though I was not nurturing it to be everlasting. I did not understand what it took to have a successful and fulfilling relationship, or how to love unconditionally. I was not there for you when you needed me the most, and now we are both suffering for my mistake.

I have changed my priorities and even though you feel they are superficial I am making them permanent and improving myself and my life. I am a better person. I make mistakes every day, but everyday I strive to be the best person I can be and the best wife I can be to you. I cannot sit here today and say that I know all that I need to know about relationships but I can, however, honestly say that I have learned a lot about honoring, cherishing and companionship. I want to learn even more about how to be a supportive and loving wife. The type of woman that I hope you would be proud to call your wife; the same pride I felt so many times when I called you my husband.

Take out hte generalizations and add in some specifics about how your behavior is changing...like I enjoy sex and am more adventurous, etc

I married you for life and I want to stay married to you. I am willing to avoid the mistakes I've made in the past and create a new life for both of us that will meet your needs. I have been trying and am willing to continue to do what it takes to be the wife you've always wanted and to address the things I did wrong in the marriage. Since December 2004, I've been trying to give you hope for the marriage by learning how to be a better wife to you and a better person overall. To give you hope that you could return to a marriage that you wanted, and for us to build our family together,

This is great, now start a new paragraph...

but the past few months have been the most difficult time of my life. Why? Give a statement about the hurt I cannot continue until you end your relationship with OW once and for all. The affair/neglect/rejection/insensitivity is so painful for me that it will destroy the love I have for you. In order to protect those feelings I must end all contact with you and avoid seeing you or talking to you. To this end I respect your decision to leave and I feel it is best that you find another place to stay while I stay in our home. WH, please understand that this is very difficult and not meant to punish you or threaten you with any ultimatum but rather to protect my feelings for you and our chances at a real reconciliation. I know that I risk loosing you forever, but I cannot continue to see you without putting pressure on you to make a decision and I don't want to make any demands on you. If you choose to come back and work on our marriage, I want to know that you have done it because you love me and not because you have felt pressured into doing it or because you feel sorry for me.
Leave this last sentence out

I ask you to respect my decision to separate from you in this way. You must know about the torturous pain and suffering I have endured because of your relationship with OW and I simply cannot be with you any longer, knowing that you are with her. I still love you but I cannot see you under these conditions.

You have chosen to spend time with this specific woman and possibly others. You have told me you are still in contact with OW, care deeply for her and that I cannot stop you from seeing her. I do not condone it, or like it, but have no choice. You are the only person who can make choices for you and I will respect your decision. I hope that you will be happy in whatever you chose and that you find peace. You are my friend, my lover and my husband. I only want true happiness for you and do not wish any harm or ill to you.

Leave this last paragraph out, it seems to be hammering home the same statements

As soon as you are willing to permanently separate from OW, demonstrate it in a credible way and are willing to follow measures to ensure total and permanent separation and most of all committed to me and our relationship, I will be willing to discuss our future together.

Sounds good, anything else you want to add here? Counseling? Time spent together?

I want us to be able to rebuild our marriage some day. I want us to be able to meet each other's emotional needs and to avoid doing anything to hurt each other. We need to build a new lifestyle in which everything we do makes us both happy. Then there will never again be a reason for us to separate. I want to be your best friend, someone who is always there for you when you need me. And I want you as my best friend. I want us to be a team, and restore our marriage together. I want you to know that no matter how bad the past was, no matter how ugly the moments have been, we can get past it. With God's help, our true healing can begin. Healthy relationships are based on honesty, openness and mutual respect and care for the other's well-being.

I would leave this paragraph out, although beautiful, will be lost on the WH. Wait till after recovery starts to say this...

I loved you when we married and I continue to love you right up to this day. You are the only person I have allowed myself to love so deeply and are the only person I will continue to love until we reach a resolution whatever the outcome may be.

I have estimated the following is my share of the expenses until we have resolved this issue - $x (mortgage and utilities). I have discontinued automatic deduction for your student loan and the statements where you can provide payments is sent by mail each month to our current address. I will also remove your account from sharing my Sprint PCS plan at your request. Please send me an email with the work address where I can send my check along with your mail. If you need access to the house, please send me an email so I can arrange to have the house available to you at a time when I am not there. In an emergency, you can reach me through email at x.

Include this paragraph in a short letter attached to the Plan B Letter, but separate. This way he can read the love letter when he needs to (and he will), and the business letter when he needs to (and he will).

I love you WH and you will always be very special to me. I look back through our life and I chose now to only remember the good times and learn from the bad. I am trying to forgive whatever pain you have caused me and hope that in time you will forgive me too. I hope we will be together again one day and find the key to each other's everlasting happiness.
Leave this paragraph out to shorten the letter..more of the same, save it for recovery.

Your loving wife,
BS


</font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Hope this helps.

My .02 worth, I'd stay in Plan A a bit longer. This is a test to see if these changes will last through a separation or if they were short term to "get him back".

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">This is a test to see if these changes will last through a separation or if they were short term to "get him back".

</font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">I agree with this. The WS has to believe that the changes are real and long-lasting. That is one of the messages that I was referring to that the WS has to get.

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial"> Indy - or should we call her Mindy? - is the only one who knows how good her Plan A has been and is the only one who can detect when she's about drained </font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">I hear what you are saying WAT but three weeks just isn't long enough IMHO.

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by mimi1254:
<strong>I hear what you are saying WAT but three weeks just isn't long enough IMHO. </strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">I agree that three weeks probably isn't long enough.

But, it's not the length of time, but rather whether Plan A improvements have been demonstrated to the WS that I believe is the determining factor. If this takes only three days, that's enough! (Granted, that's an extreme only for illustration.)

I'll also agree that even IF the Plan A improvements have been demonstrated, but the BS can implement the stuff Pep and ark suggest (those vixens! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> ) because there's still enough in the ole lovebank to avoid LBs, then Plan A 'till the aliens come home. But when do you stop?

So, suggest when Indy/Mindy should do it? <img border="0" title="" alt="[Razz]" src="images/icons/tongue.gif" />

WAT