Last weekend my WW wanted to talk about what would happen if we divorced. She feels our relationship is going to go one of two ways, we stay together or split, and she wanted to discuss both alternatives. I didn't want to discuss as I don't even want to view divorce as an option. Well, she pushed and one major item that came out was my feeling that I should have the kids if we were to divorce.

In no uncertain terms did my wife tell me that she thought she should have the kids and would do whatever she had to to have them if our we moved to divorce. She was absolutley baffled, deeply hurt by, and just could not believe that I thought I should get the kids if we would divorce. She says it has totally changed her view of me and she actually said she hated me. Talk about a blow. Since then I thought things have been going OK but we had a discussion last night (which made me realize again how far off we are) and WW made a point to say that she has NOT forgotten about it.

Where do I go with this?

-- Pak23

Do you see that fog rollin' in? I do. Of course your relationship is going to go one of two ways. You will either fix your marriage or end up divorced. As far as who gets the kids in a divorce it's not up to you if you both want them. The court will determine. I wouldn't get into that discussion with her again. I'm sure she said she hated you because she didn't expect for you to say you wanted the kids. Next time she wants to talk about this I would tell her that you don't want a divorce and don't really want to talk about it, you are concetrating on saving this marriage so both of you will get to have the kids.

Good luck