my ww just called and i lost it, my nerv es are shot , my life is a wreck, my emotions are out of control. i dont know how much more of this i can take. i just want to curl up in a corner and disapear. i probably set myself back in my plan a , i dont even know if i even want to try anymore. she dont care why should i

Dalson,

What did she say?

Dalson,
I am not really sure what your situation is...so I am sorry that I can not help more. You sound very despirate. Are you seeking medical attention and on Anti-depressants? If not that might be a good idea at this point.

I sometime wonder WHY I am holding on as well. I think right now you should focus on YOU and your mental and physical health before worrying WHY and IF you should continue to work for your marriage.

Bless you
Danielle

(((((Dalson)))))) What happened??? What was the conversation? What did she say?? What did you say back???

I know the feeling hon, it's hard when you have to stuff down all these emotions you feel while doing plan A.

C'mon boy.....post!!!!

-Caren

dalson.......

What is up?

Chances are it's not as bad as you think!

I have often thought I screwed up and lost it on my WW.

We all make mistakes in this life...

Don't beat you're self up too much.

It happens. What was said? What did she say back?

Vent here! We listen.

the conversation started about ins on a rent house we have i needed some info to complete the policy. but it turned to this weekend, she is going to her parents, who are going thru a d also. well her dad needed a dining room set and a microwave and i had 1 so i said he could use it . well since her and her parents cleaned out our house i asked if she would bring it home with her, she said i need to talk to her dad about that, he thinks i gave it to him.
the dining room set was my grandmothers.
i dont know what triggered it but, i lost it and just went into a bawling fit. i dont want to talk to anyone in her family, i have nothing to say to them. i feel they betrayed me.

Dalson,

As hard as it right now....you need to remove yourself from the situation.

Get a lawyer to handle the furniture issue. That way you won't have to communicate with the family.

The emotional issues are a lot harder. I know...I've been there.

Is there anyone close to you that you can confide in or rely on right now?

ive just had it with her family, they blame her a on me, it is all my fault, her mother has both daughters screwed up in the head so much.
every man in eithers life "is just like your father" and that is a good enough reason to not take responsibility for there action

Dalson,

Where did you leave things with your wife? Is this meltdown related solely to her family?

i pretty much left it with im tired of all of this crap and said i cant wait till this d is final so i dont have to deal with your fam anymore (bad lb) she hu on me i called back and said i was sorry but i cannot deal with the lies anymore (about a) and asked if she would come clean, she said she would, but i wont like it

danigirl i am on ad zoloft for 2 mos

I am sorry that this is so painful for you...
Vent away here, there are so many wonderful ears on this board.
Do you think you would want her to come clean even if it hurt? Maybe you could explain that to her?

Danielle

dalson, at least your WW will come clean with you (maybe <img border="0" title="" alt="[Roll Eyes]" src="images/icons/rolleyes.gif" /> )

I understand that this is frustrating. Her family is sticking up for her since she is blood. My IL are doing the same, I think.

Dalson,

What do you want your W to "come clean" about? Are you concerned that the A is still going on? Or...are you still trying to get the who, what, when details of the A?

In dealing with her family, you are going to have to put emotions behind. If you can;t afford an attorney...find someone yo utrust who can act as your agent in this.

i know who i just want why how many times ect
i know it is gonna hurt but i need the truth from her so i can begin to trust again

as for her coming clean we will see

i already have an attorney, my d was filed 12/17

Oh Dalson- I am sorry for what you are going through today. Really I am. Many people I have met who are suffering from a spouse's infedelity their parents just side with them and say that they just want them happy. What that is is a cop out from admitting they failed to instill basic decent morals.

Could you calmly contact your STBXFIL and explain the value to you that your Grandmothers table is to you? Or that they cleaned you out and you need a table for your kids to eat at. Otherwise I suppse legal action could be taken- however that does tend to add up. It could not hurt to try the civil route first.

How are you doing now? Have the waves calmed? Has your WW called you back?

More importantly is there anything I can do to help you?

kmej
she did call we talked and i think im finally ready to quit. i think the indecision has been what is killing me because after the talk im completely at ease. we are getting a divorce and im fine with it. its weierd my stomach isnt tight im not shaking wow.

I am not sure what to say. I am happy that you are presently at piece with all this, however I am sad at the state of your marriage, and what this will do to your kids. I am a former child from a divorced home caused by an affair. I just hope that you can find a way to make piece with your wifes betrayal so that the bitterness does not ingulf you so that it gets to your kids, My dad tried to forgive my mom but it took years until he could talk about her with out his eyes turning cold. It made an open relationship with my parents very hard. About 6 years ago they made amends, and things have been better- however the 8 years up to that were hard. Just some food for thought.

I truely wish you all the best. IF you ever need to talk call me out, I will be here for you. IF you are not on, I can give you my e-mail address or something if you need.

kmej
thanks for all the support, i think im gonna take a break from here for a while, but who knows what the rollercoaster has in store, but im gonna try my work has been slacking thanks everyone
lets hope this is real
ill probably be back tommorow

<small>[ January 11, 2005, 05:27 PM: Message edited by: dalson ]</small>

I hear you about letting work get behind. I no longer post during the day, as I am being watched like crazy... I hope all continues to go well for you. Best of luck to you again.

<small>[ January 11, 2005, 05:16 PM: Message edited by: KMEJ ]</small>

thanks good luck