I'm beginning to think it's me that's been in a fog, not my WH. And I think my fog is lifting. I think he's always been focused on his needs & has only occasionally met the needs of others when he's not inconvenienced. Emotionally he doesn't have enough to really see the pain I feel & the damage he's done to our marriage. We're almost 2 years into this. He's apologized but not in a way that shows me much remorse for what's happened to us. I think I only see what I think are signs of recovery because that's what I want to believe. I feel like any talk about meeting EN's revolve about how necessary it is to meet his before he really feels he's able to meet mine. I realize one of us has to get the ball rolling but I also need to see an honest on-going effort on his part. Until the last few months I continued to hold him in high regard, but the things he says have pretty much destroyed that. I can't help but look at him in wonder at what a selfish, self-centered man he is & has been. Our past happiness was based on my lack of boundaries- his happiness at my expense. Now that I'm learning to establish & hold clear boundaries the real spoiled child/adult in him is front & center. I keep telling myself that I need to allow time for us to adjust to the changes in the dynamics of our marriage & we'll learn to have a stronger more balanced relationship. But I'm getting so tired of all of this. Is it time for me to pull my head out of the fog & accept the reality of what I see. I wonder if there really is something "on the other side" or if what we're living is all there's going to be.