Hi all,<P>I had a really good day today. I felt good, I smelled good and I LOOKED REALLY good (Wore a suit I haven't been able to wear in YEARS)<P>Anyway, I received many compliments from people at work and I even got some wolf-whistle from some friendly construction workers ( normally I would poo-poo that, but I thought I take what I can get)<P>I met my h at play group for our daughter. She was asleep when we got there, so I told him that we would have to do it another day. He just looked at me like I was a monster or something. He didn't say hi, he didn't want to talk about anything, he certainly didn't tell me that I looked nice ( I told him HE did). He just got in his car and left. What is up with this. Why is he treating me with so much hate. I am not the one who had an affair. I am not the one who wants a divorce. <P>I have NOT LB all week. This is a major accomplishment for me. Do you think he is just confused? Or, do you think that he really doesn't love him and truly wants me to move on without him? <P>I hate second guessing everything. I makes me so tired, but I can't seem not too.<P>Thanks,<BR>Cheryl

Hi! He DID notice, ya know. But he wouldn't SAY anything, you know that too! Glad you had a good day. But YOU knew you looked good, didn't you?????!!!!<P>You know he has to act like he blames you, too, don't you? You've been so good this week - I'm really proud of you. <P>How's the little one, by the way? Keep doing what you're doing - I think it's great. Sorry I'm not good at advice today, but I am glad to hear from you! <P>Lori

ceecee - lostva is absolutely right. Take if from a member of that obnoxious sex, there isn't a man alive who doesn't notice an attractive women. He did that on purpose to yank your chain.<P>As to the second guessing, welcome to the club. At this point, it's probably all you are going to have, so just try not to overdo it like I do....<P>You are definitely getting STRONGER !!! Keep it up. I, too, am proud of you....

Your fast, Lori. I don't know what is what anymore. I am really starting to feel like life without him will be ok. He doesn't seem to want a relationship of any kind. He just wants to see Emma on occasion. As Emma would say, "Mom, what goin on here?"<P>She is sleeping right now. She has a terrible cold. I hate it when she gets sick. I feel so helpless. <P>Thank for your words. I'm still trying to figure out why my e-mail isn't working. I'll keep trying.<P>Love you,<BR>Cheryl

Thanks heartpain. I was posting when you were, so I missed you the first time around.<P>It's nice to hear from the opposite sex. I know I looked good today. He never was one to pay a compliment without some fishing first.<P>Thanks for the encouragement. Time is the healer.<P>Cheryl

Hi CeeCee -<P>You sound good.......I'm glad!!!<P>He noticed!!!! Being a jerk....Argh!!!<P>Keep up the good work and the strong attitude, it will help you through this.<P>Hugs,<P>Sheba

Hi Sheba-<BR>Thanks for the words. I do feel better today. Better than I have in a long time. I know he has to be wondering, even if it's a little, why he is letting me go. Oh, well.<P> How goes your battle? Did you get your TV yet?<P>Cheryl

Hi CeeCee -<P>The battle rages on......<P>Went and got the TV by myself!!!!<P>I got it all set up though, I wanted it ready to tape the new shows cuz I have to watch my baseball on the main one. I have a two line cable system and it's not rigged to tape one thing and watch another.<BR> <BR>And to think - my H used to work for a cable company and couldn't take the time to rig the main TV and VCR correctly!!!<P>aaaarrrrrrggggggghhhhhh!!!<P>Hugs,<P>Sheba

Hi ceecee....<P>I think that your H noticed you. He just didn't want to acknowledge it. Keep doing things for yourself that make you feel and look good. Not only will it make you feel good about yourself...you will glow and it will be reflected upon yourself to others!

Hey Cheryl,<BR>If Hubby can't notice how great you now look than he must be crazy! Feels pretty good to be whistled at by men don't it. There are lots of really good, handsome men out there so don't sell yourself short. You know you are a good catch.<BR> Oops gotta go get Chera. Talk to ya later!

Hi Cheryl,<P>Yeah, of course your husband noticed you looked good. And of course he didn't say anything. He's still in that justification mode.<P>I'm glad you haven't love busted! Keep it up! It doesn't matter that he's not responding in kind. What matters is that you remain strong to yourself!<P>good luck as always,<BR>--andy

ceecee - <P>I 2nd what airheart said. There isn't a non-blind guy alive that doesn't evaluate every woman that he sees. It's just something we do.<P>My guess is that there is a lot of inner turmoil and seeing you look so good causes him to feel angry (because he can see what he's missing). Putting up a wall by being cold and distant might make you angry at him, further justifying in his mind why he left you. You behaved perfectly, complimented him, didn't lovebust and showed him that you "are getting along just fine, thank you"...even though on the inside you might be dying.<P>Keep this strategy going!!! He did definitely notice, on that you can be assured!!

ceecee,<BR>He noticed .... there is a book called Private Lies that states that there is nothing you can do while your spouse is in this insanity. Yoou can't make em jealous, you can't giult them into it, all you can do is t take care of yourself and find things to do that betters yourself. It sounds like you are doing just that so keep it up. The more changes in you will help you first and he will also keep noticing that as time goes on you don't need him and quite possibly he will realize how much he needs you. Either way, you win.....<BR>Michael

ceecee-maybe he's mad at you for looking so good when he's soooooo miserable? Maybe he feels as though the only one you should look that good for is his majesty and that you looked good for you was too much for him to take? Either way, YOU GO GIRL!!!! <P>------------------<BR>Chick's<P>You won't see things until your ready to not be blind!<BR>