I opted not to have the sheriff deliver the D papers instead I had them delivered via registered certified mail. My WW called to let me know she did recieved them and someone in her office signed for them, which is ILLEGAL. The Postal Worker surely asked for Mrs. Family Matters ONLY that's the point of registered certified mail. Then to make matters worse my WW signed the return receipt or according to her whomever signed for the papers signed my WW's signature illegibly. At any rate, I am proceeding with the next step towards divorce. Tomorrow I will forward my proof of service to the court office to have the intial dates set.

Reportedly my W told my mother that she's not sure if she wants the divorce, that if her and I could just talk...?? I have no idea what that means because she has never called me ONCE and stating that she needed to talk about us and a possible reconciliation. My brother and his W report my WW saying she wasn't sure if divorce was the right choice and she's concerned about all the time we've put into our R and the well-being of our S. I repeat my W has NEVER met with me regarding my choice for the divorce, infact initially she was the one threatening divorce, I am just the one who grew tired first of the back and forth and made the decision to end the M.

What do I do folks? I'm proceeding on with my life as planned. I cannot say I'm happy with my outcome, but I had to make a decision to STOP allowing her to manipulate our M and to treat our family and our M as something she could put on the shelf until she was in the mood to be responsibile. I am in a stern Plan B. I have no idea if its workingm, but my email account has been cracked more times than a truck load of eggs tossed from Washington Monument, which in itself may in some cooky way seem encouraging, but I'd much rather have my W be a grown up and handle things like adults.

I don't know why I'm posting other than tonight it was hard to peer through the peephole when she dropped off our S. I envisioned asking her to come in and have a seat so we could talk., but I did NOT. I'm so committed to getting my life back and reclaiming my power that instinctively I opened the door just enough for my S to enter and closed it quickly. I've never been divorced before, but I must admit this whole business is difficult. I miss companionship, SF, laughing at movies and tv shows, reading our S bed time stories together while we mimmicked the characters, family dinners and regular day to day life, but as much as it pains me to say, I still miss my Pre D-Day W or should I say PRE-AFFAIR W and unfortunately unless she wises up soon divorce is the only REMEDY.

...I feel like such a jerk for even imagining taking her back, but sometimes I do imagine it..

alot.


Sincerely,

FM

She is still planting a fantasy. Trying to make it appear she wants recon when she is fueling her own A or A like fantasy.

Clarify the real sitch with those people. So they are aware she is now playing games with them as well. If you can and they are receptive, make them your support.

Stay strong. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" /> Keep posting here for strength.

take care,
L.

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by Orchid:
<strong> She is still planting a fantasy. Trying to make it appear she wants recon when she is fueling her own A or A like fantasy.

Clarify the real sitch with those people. So they are aware she is now playing games with them as well. If you can and they are receptive, make them your support.

Stay strong. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" /> Keep posting here for strength.

take care,
L. </strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Thanks for responding Orchid <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

Yes! I agree she is still straddling the fence and playing me even as her M unravels. I don't have any contact info for the "Usual Suspects" and frankly I don't have the energy for another bout of exposure. If my WW still continues down this road we will be divorced inside of a few months.

I deserve better ORCHID...

and I know it in my heart that life wont always be like this.

Hey FM.

Definitely what Orchid said: clarify with your family.

Is WW working now? Where is she living? Had you sent a "Plan B" letter?

How is your S through all of this? Any news on your D?

Have you been pursuing what you spoke about last time? You said it in your post: time to start working on you. Ironic thing is, you've already been working on you since all of this crap happened--don't forget how much YOU have changed for the better.

Sorry for the barage of questions. I completely understand if you don't answer them.

Just keeping you and your family in our prayers.

{{FM}}

FM,

Just keep moving and be ready for anything. My wife filed after two years of back and forth separation and supposedly trying to work on things. But it took going to court and our kids being given to me as the primary physical custodian before the fog was blown away. even after divorce, I cant believe how high remarriage is for the couple that just divorced.

I dont say this so much as encouragement as to say that you should leave all options open. As you said, if you saw your wife (not the WW) walking up to the front door, you would probably welcome her home. We have no idea if she will show up again. So, until then...keep moving forward.

It is her move. Within a day after court and the custoday hearing, my wife was on the phone with me. She was in bed and losing it. she kept calling me every 4 hours. But no longer blaming me. Within a week, we were going out to dinner to talk and going to church as a family together for the second time in three years. And within two more weeks, we were back in the same house and my wife pushing for us to move our relationship forward.

So, it is possible. So, just move forward and keep a watchful eye on the horizon...just in case your WW heads back to the Mother Ship (thank you WAT) and the aliens allow your wife to return.

In His arms.