Okay, after a couple of days flat on my back, I decided to really do Plan A. I haven't LB-ed. Set a few limits but nothing too bad. We've spent a lot of time together this weekend.
I've worked really hard to look nice and be pleasant. Even if he can't compliment me, I've complimented him and showed a lot of interest in his work. Sunday night, we had a date night. He only showed up an hour late, supposedly watching football. We went out for a nice dinner at a place we've never been to before and ended up at a local "pub". Unexpectedly, a man from who'd been on the ill-fated Singapore trip with WH, his wife and another couple were there. We fell in to talking with them and had a nice time. It was fun to be with other couples. Either WH and OW HAVE been discreet at work or this man was very polite.
Earlier in the weekend, WH had said he'd go with DD and I to a rodeo we go to every year on MLK Day. He's never gone with us, never even been to a rodeo and sounded interested. Of course,on Monday morning, he was singing a different, "I don't want to go, I want to be by myself" tune when he dropped DD off from her stay with him. I was upset. DD was Really upset. After WH left, she called him and eventurally talked him into going. A good and bad idea because he wasn't very enthusaistic. It was nice to share it with him anyway. The rodeo theme this year is "grab life by the horns". I like it.
It was also our son's birthday. He'd done a college visit that day and wanted a nice birthday dinner at home. DS wanted Singapore food.
Soooo, WH, DD and I stop at a nice, new Asian market that recently opened on our way home from the rodeo. As soon as we walked in, WH started mentally distance himself from us. I could see his head was flashing back to Singapore with OW. Screw this, I thought. So I got bubbly about what a great store it was and how much I loved Singapore and it's food. How much fun it was when we went together and the time the kids were with us.
By the time we left, he was into monosyllables and surly-mode. I called him on. It was rude and boreish behavior and we hadn't done anything to deserve it. I suggested that he take us home, go back to his apartment to rest and make whatever "phone calls" he needed and then come back for dinner.
An hour later, our house looked nice. DD had set the table beautifully. I was mostly finished preparing an Asian feast and had a cherry pie in the oven. (DS wanted pie instead of cake.) WH brought a bottle of good champagne and a present. The food was great. We talked about DS's college visit. We laughed a lot about the things our family did on our trip 2 1/2 years ago to Singapore. WH started with a "sliver" of cherry pie but then helped himself to a couple more.
It was a good time. WH left with some leftovers and a smile. I felt we had disfused Singapore a bit. Hopefully, he can now remember the other things that have happend there besides OW. And when we got to MC today, I'm taking him a piece of pie.
Plan A going okay, MB buddies?
