I am getting real tired of this sh@t -he says one thing and seems so remoreseful then after a few hours goes back to the liesand denial. Blames me for his A . I do not think this M can be saved -he is and has always blamed others for what he has done wrong. He is and has been so stuck with all of this and it is getting worse. Calls me yesterday am after reading MB information I gave him re: the deceit of an affair. All sorry and upset with himself about what he has done. Then a few hours later states she OW did not commit deceit with her H. Then states that I work alot and with alot of people and I do the same thing he has done. I am a professional not a cheat and he can read all my e-mails, I do not have anything covered up opr hidden from him. I am the open book.I just don't see that this M has a chance. I want to tell him it is useless and we need to move on. Any advice??

This is offered with the preface that I don't know squat. If the posiyive things you get from the marriage outwiegh the negative, you have a net gain and in the long run it is worth the emotional investment to be married to this person. If you make a list of the positives (even the ones you forgot), do they outweigh the negative? Does your hurt feel so big that you can't see anything else? Take a deep breath and look again. Again, I don't know squat, so take it for what it's worth.

You know I have been doing alot of reading and serching for answers. I have come to the realization -light bulb moment. That over the past 2 + years that I went tru a greiving period for my WH after he told me he was no longer in love with me. It took me a year to come out of it somewhat but the pain was still raw. After DDay -I lost all hope that he would ever come back. I realize I am exhausted from all of this and am starting to question wether if I am still in love with WH. I do not feel any love in my heart for him. I feel nothing -I have SF with him -he is great - he is attractive. I just do not like him or what he is and has been doing. I do not see him changing his personality -he blames others for what he is responsible and always has -my MC saw this and it relieved me a great deal. But as I wake up I see he has done this all of the time I have known him. Can I live with someone who blames others ? I find it sickening. I don't care it dosen't bother me anymore when he blames me -I just walk away when he starts.