I know I've seen your name around. But tonight I read some of your posts, and I swear we could be twins!!

My WH's OW is 19
I have 3 boys
Youngest 2 continually climb into bed with me, nightly (even before Daddy left)

I wonder what else? It was just uncanny to read some of your stuff!!!

-Christine

I thought it was uncanning myself.

Well H was 25 when he cheated on me with a 19 y/d- kids were at the time, 6,2,and 3 months. All boys- H was disappointed he did not get a girl but has accepted that now and loves them all to pieces.

My H and I are both 26 (H is almost 27)- still fight with the middle one (Lucas-4) to stay in own bed all night- he is actually in my bed sound asleep now- but H is at work so I do not have to move him yet. H tries to keep him out by locking the door and he will knock and stick his fingers under the door and say "Hey tuys- I'm out here- see my piners?" It is so cute I have to open the door and let him in. However if H wanted SF there are ways around that- and plenty of other rooms to use! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

SF with the kids in our beds was a issue when H decided to cheat- actually claimed it was a big issue- I doubt it since when Michael was 4 days old I innitiated SF- not like I was not interested.

ANyway would love to get to know you more and chat more- however I am recoverying from mono and have to be up at 5:30- so better get some rest. thanks for posting to me.
Good night

Well, we're a bit older than you. I am 35 and WH is 37. OW (19) was the nanny for our 2 youngest boys for a year. We actually hired her away from a daycare center we were using. Since OW was on her parents insurance and about to go over the age of 18, she either needed to get into college full time or get a job that offered insurance. She toggled back and forth for a while, but my MIL retired a year early to help us out. WH ended up hiring her at his office. BIG MISTAKE. I guess it took 2 months of them working together before this crap started. Yes, I know they both take 100% of blame for the A, and I take some responsibility for not meeting his ENs that placed him there. But, in all fairness, without him communicating those missed needs, I had no clue.

MIL lives with us. My FIL actually died before we were married, and she was not doing well on any level. So, we've all lived together since the dawn of our marriage. She's great with the boys and helps us as much as we help her. Poor dear, after Dday she took so much of the blame on herself, thinking if she weren't around our marriage would have been different.

It's her son, and she gives me all the support. Everyone still loves and cares for him, but no one has alienated him...just don't approve of his actions.

I hope you get over your Mono relatively soon, I hear it takes a while to feel 100%.

I'm doing this at work, so time is a cruch. I will try to get on tonight and see what's going on.

Thanks for the reply.

-Christine

Did I happen to mention that this OW was a live in nanny for us as well as working for H? Apparently she was doing a better job taking care of H then the kids <img border="0" title="" alt="[Eek!]" src="images/icons/shocked.gif" /> .

Anyway I will try to be on again later however it is 47* here and the kids think it is spring and want to go outside!

It just keeps getting more odd....that's amazing!!

I e-mailed back and forth all day with WH, and he's back to his original babble about needing to find himself, but says he's still not saying there's no hope for us.

He claims OW will be going to college full time in the fall....if it goes on that long, I may be brain dead. Since his office knows, HR dept made them each sign docs saying it was all consentual so she couldn't cry sexual harassment...he's pretty big there and didn't want to throw that away (nice to think of it after the fact...and what about us? He's lucky I found this site!!). Anyway, it hasn't been PA in over a month, but EA is just as worse, if not more so!!

I'll chat again later too.

Enjoy the weather!!

-Christine

My H was pushing the OW to get into college- he wanted her to grow up and she wanted to play and have fun. He even brought her to college to sign up a few times... She never did end up going (maybe now- I do not know).

My H got fired as he was her boss and that was not allowed. They gave him a choice stop seeing her out side of work and keep your job, or continue seeing her and lose your job. They tried to be secretive about their happenings- however he forgot the give me that piece of information and HIS boss and I were/are friends and I was unknowingly gave him all the information he needed to fire him. H blames me for his losing his job- thinks it has nothiing to do with him- and has not let me for get it. I do not agree.

I got the same song and dance about my H- how he just was not sure. That is just there way of keeping his cake and eating it too longer. He is a cake eating fence eater, and it is time to knock him down. I bought it hook line and sinker. I let him toy with me for 8 months. Then I got strong (well he moved out then)and I started to move on with my life. He moved out the mid-end of January and was back in by mid March promiseing me everything. It was a bad move to except him back so fast with out my boundaries being met- and I am paying for it- however going dark worked well.

Sorry if that was a big ramble. Hope all is going better for you.

Not really, I swear our stories are as similar as could be.

Emotionally I am having a really tough week (could be hormones from my cycle), it's only been roughly two weeks with him out. It's still plan Aish, we try to have limited contact (we used to IM/e-mail/talk throughout the day)but he comes by nightly to get clothes or see his sons. Last night was really, really bad for me. This morning I took my wedding ring set off and left them on the bathroom vanity with a note that said "WS, I am not mad & I have not lost hope. Everytime I see these it reminds me of what I don't have. Please take them. I only want them back when you want me as your wife. Love, Christine". He had a Dr. appt this morning and came by to get changed, I was at work. When I came home everything was as I had left it. He came by before going to the gym, only here real quick, me & MIL were out back smoking and he just popped his head out to say he'd be back...I didn't have time to say anthing. When I checked again, note was there but the rings were gone. When he came back again (last of the day, about 30 minutes total), we were cordial and had small talk. After he kissed boys goodnight, he asked if I would be on-line later, that "I'll talk to you later" (it mostly never happens....he doesn't really talk with me too much anymore). Now I'm freaking that the ring-thing will prompt a plan B or divorce prodeecings....or maybe I'm paranoid. I just want my husband back, our family saved, and my loneliness ended (don't we all?).

Sorry, my vent right back at you!!

How's everything for you?

-Christine