This site has been a Godsend to me at times over the past year. Many friends have been made that I will cherish forever. I will always remember all the nights I sat up and cried until the wee hours of the morning and you all always came to help me! yes, I was always stubborn, but always took your advice and thought long and hard about it.

Now that I am finally in Plan B, I was feeling at peace. Really feeling good about myself. But now, I cant do it anymore! i cant live this life anymore.

In the past day, I have been called a loser, a ***** and I ahve been told I need to get the balls and divorce the SOB. all by different people. The person who told me to divorce the SOB was mean and hurtful to me. She also doesn't know what Plan B is about. I HAVE been moving forward...I want to do what is best for my family. Yes, in the long run saving the marriage is what I want. But Ed knows what needs to be done. This person has no clue about Plan B. She thinks I will take him back today. NO I wont...conditions must be met, which have gone thru the intermediary.

I havent' stopped crying for 2 hours now. Homework needs to be done and I cant even face my children right now. God, I need help! I want to run away. I just cant do this anymore. The promises, the betrayal..I hate my life.

<small>[ January 26, 2005, 06:47 PM: Message edited by: Justuss ]</small>

Mom,
If there is anything I can do, even lend an ear, e-mail me.

daniellejohns@cox.net

I know how hard this is....
Think though, with the unstable life Ed has been living, do you really want him having custody of the children?

Danielle

Now momto3boys

Just wrote you an essay it got lost computer crashed. So i fixed it.

Just like you can fix yourself you are in charge of you.

Today is bad i can see that but oh tomorrow could be so much better we must keep hope.

You will see the boys smile and your heart will melt they love you so.

Just keep talking to everyone here it is oh so good to talk.

You are a wounderful mother dont let anyone take that from you whatever else.

m23b i have never posted to you and dont know your whole story, but.
i know you hurt right now, ive been there and have thought the same thoughts. dont give him custody you know that is not what is best for your kids. gain your strength from them and god. i know it seems hoprless but its not. your kids are depending on you,DONT GIVE UP. do you really want your h to raise your kids with the descisions he has and is making. i dont know what the laws are in your state but, with a job, child support and alimony your kids standard of living will not drop as much as you think, plus im sure your kids will give up some of the worldy things to have the stability of a mother who has stuck with them over a father who deserted them for another women. kids are smarter than we think. now grab your boot straps and pick yourself up and get back on that horse and fight for what is right. we are here for you when you need added strength

Mom, I just sent a prayer for strength up to God for you. I'm very frightened by your post. Please stay on line with us if you can.

((((((((((MOM))))))))))

I bet if you asked the boys what they needed from you, they would say LOVE. Works out perfect, because that is what you said you can give them. Love them boys, mom.

KY

Mom don't ever let you boys go -boys need their mother so much. I too was left with tow boys and felt the same way amny years ago. You know what hey have said =we didn't have much money but we had lots of love. Isn't that sweet. What a memory. My sons knew their father was not dependable but I heard them when grew up they said if Mom says she will do it she will if she can. She is not like DAD..That made me proud and made me feel so loved. They knew if I could do something they needed I would -barring weather and accidents. Please wthings will get better -you will get a job, he will have to pay child support. Things will get better. How long has this seperation been for?/ Please things look bad now they will change..Please talk to us -

mom - No - You are not thinking right. Please email me at digsblues@aol.com.

(((hugs))) from one Mom to another. YOU CAN DO THIS! I was feeling this last night, sobbed for hours, so much so I puked. Took a razor blade to WH and asked him to kill me. My eternal soul is not worth it though, he made me throw away the blade BTW. I figured the kids who hate him and it would be the ultimate revenge. How sad, how short-sighted (of me!)

My kids need someone who is making good decisions for the right reasons. Not some selfish man who acts barely a child himself! I know you are hurting, but I also know you love those boys. It is painfully apparent. My heart aches for you right now. I could have written that to some degree!

Even if it means getting a min. wage job, getting on medicaid, food stamps and finding section 8 housing, it is still better to do this than allow your boys to go with a man who has proven himself irresponsible. This too shall pass, and you can get through this!

K,

Sorry you are feeling so down. Been down this path before, remember? It gets hard then better, then hard and better, then the cycle starts all over again.

Your children need you and you need them. I am not telling you anything new but may the reminders energize your soul.

You have my e-mail addy....if you need to talk, let me know. ok?

Hugz,
L.

M23B -

Hon, it IS going to be okay. You don't see it and can't feel it right now. But it will.

Look at those boys. They need you.

Email me: I've sent you an email.

Call me: I left you my cell number on your VM.

Or, call or email one of the other people here who care so much about you and are reaching out.

YOU ARE A WONDERFUL WOMAN, AN AMAZING MOTHER AND A GREAT PERSON, MOM.

DO NOT LET ANYONE ELSE DICTATE TO YOU WHO OR WHAT YOU ARE!

Allow yourself to lean on others right now. Call someone who you can talk to.

Lots of love and prayers.

FIM

I lift you up to the Lord in prayer. Call someone, anyone, to help you get through this. DO NOT let him win, you are better than this!

Mom,

Don't worry about homework right now. Take care of you emotionally. Is there someone who can come over and give you a hand for this evening?

I don't know who you've been talking to who was so harsh, but block them out and stick with us, we're not giving up on you and you're always welcome here.

I've notified your friends at SYMC to give you some emotional support...hang in there.

Momto3Boys, please try and look at the bigger picture. It is a great big world out there. So many more places to go, so many more people to meet. I am a great believer that a person's happiness cannot hinge solely on one other. It has got to go further than that. You've had these bad days before and got through them. You know you are down but have the ability to rise again.

My children have been my saviours in all of this. I would be incredibly lonely if I didn't have their lives to sort out and keep me busy. You have been the dependable, loving parent to your boys. They need you. Is it because they are such hard work and you are just finding it too difficult on your own? I am so truly sorry you are at rock bottom today but I know you won't stay there.

Momto3Boys...I have taken the liberty of sending off an email to the Dr.P show re this post, in the hopes that they can find somebody to intervene. Sweetie, don't let yourself be alone right now.

I've only posted a couple of times to you, but I've read many of your posts over the last couple of months. You are stronger than you know hon, even though right now you don't feel very strong.

I'm sure many here on this board have been at that desperate place that you are right now. All hope seems gone...but really it is just a perception, hope is never gone, it just hides a bit sometimes.

Do not let Ed get custody of the boys....he has set the worst example for them to follow. I'm sure the boys love him, and they should, but they need to be with their Mom while their father figures out WTF he's doing.

So Candy, cry it out today. Get somebody over to help with the boys if you can. Just take care of yourself tonight. A warm bath...or a long shower (great for drowning out the noise of the crying). Make a cup of tea....no wine, I always go for the wine, and regret it after.

Candy, I don't know you, but my heart breaks for you right now. Don't do anything irrational. You're responding to the pain, but the pain will go...I promise you that...it will go.

(((HUGS)))

{{{HUGS}}}} PLease don't give up! You are a strong woman! You WILL survive this...I promise! Your boys need you....don't give up custody. You will regret that desicion. Please don't do that!!!!!!!!!!!
1...get a job
2...seek help
3...continue to love those boys. They NEED their mom.
Here is my email address....please feel free to wirte.... TREICH70@aol.com
I'm here and will help in any way I can.

Candy, I'm on the phone with Kimmy, she has no computer access and doesn't have your #. She can't find you through 411 either, she is requesting you call her.

Still praying and hoping to hear from you.

KY

Kandi,

Really think about this. You don't really want this. I know how hard it is. Don't let other people get you down. Be proud of yourself and who you are. I am sure you are a great mom and your kids know it.

Think about who is going to raise your kids if you give up custody. It isn't going to be just Ed, remember that. They are your babies, not hers.

Prayers and hugs.

HINY

k4yellow
you know someone in her area? if you do get them over there!!!
try worldpages.com for tn

Kimmy or Kyellow,

Could you please email me at paulaann_hernandez@hotmail.com ? I've got her number.

FIM

I've left Momto3boys a voicemail on her home phone.

L.