O~~~

Pink and I have some history of conversations previously (years ago) where I gave her my honest opinion that she was still functioning with the "OW mentality" when it comes to marriage.

I see a change in her, something I think is worthy of my respect for her effort to make the self-adjustments necessary to have a real MB marriage, as opposed to a marriage more akin to the spirit of an OW married to a MM.... if you see what I mean.

Pep

<small>[ January 28, 2005, 11:13 AM: Message edited by: Pepperband ]</small>

TPP

In response to your original question (10 pages ago), why haven't you tried the most obvious method of deciding what to do - i.e to put yourself in the XW's shoes?

Imagine that your marriage continues for a fair few years, and then your H tells you that he's been seeing someone else. That he loves her. And then leaves you.

Would you like to hear from the OW at that point? What would you like to hear? THINK.

And then suppose that a few years go by. Your H divorces you, marries the OW, and you gradually rebuild yourself and find a way through the pain and devastation. And meet someone else, and make yourself take the risk again.

Would you like to hear from the OW at that point? What would you like to hear? THINK.

I'm not suggesting one thing or another. I'm simply asking yourself to empathise with another woman's experience.

Or, are you perhaps doing this - subconsciously? Are you at some level fearful that what happened to your H's XW is what may happen to you?

You know what they say about a man who marries a mistress creating a vacancy?

TogetherAlone