ok, its has been 4 years since the affair my H
had with the x. very hard to get past the whole
episode when you have got to look at this person on a constant level. I believe I could have a little peace if she were just someone that caught his fancy and moved on. But NO>> she has to be like salt rubbing in the wound every other weekend. He claims he doesn't love or care for her
but he gets nervous everytime I am standing there in their presents. Am I just trying to read into things or AM I so stupid I can't see the real truth.?
Has anyone ever experience this.. if so where are you? I try not to be bitter. But is it ever so hard. I know for the C sake that having a picture of mom in there room is a must but, I hate going into that bedroom and seeing the woman in my house that help contribute to the love lost in our once happy(so I thought) marriage.
thanks for the spill..

Wow that has to be hard. It sounds as if both of you are uncomfortable about it. Maybe because of his past mistake he feels uncomfortable and that he don't want you feel that way. It has been a long time and I know the pain don't just go away. Have you asked him to go to MC with you? It might help. I hope there is nothing going on now between them.

He hasn't gone to MC. I have been to C but never
openedup to her about this. It seems so degrading. I am so humiliated. I have C that were
going to C because there dad and I have to meet at a police station because of all the domestic violence orders just to swap the children. In meeting my H that I am married to now, Even though they were D. I encouraged them to get along thinking I was helping them both for their
C. Being what I thought was a supporting person ended up pushing them to sleep together. Ouch..

You have done nothing wrong in being nice. You realy need to tell your C and let him/her bring your WH into it when the C thinks you are ready. Don't hold back your feeling. How I aproach my wife with sensitive subjects is I feel ... because...ect. Have you told your husband that you still feel hurt?

Yes he knows, but he just thinks I should get over it. The hardest part is when he says he loves me or wants to have sex. That seems to trigger in my mind...yeah right. then he gets mad and just says nothing. so I say nothing. All it will do is start a conversation that really goes nowhere but back to my questions of why, how could you, was I not good enough, what could I have done diffently? Just alot of wondering. She is about ten years younger than we are and I think maybe he is attracted to that. or was.. who knows. I can hold my own, I was in State Pagents when I was young and even though I am 40 I have maintained myself.. I think..ha! but man will something like this ever make you insecure.
My MC said that the first H,(my kids dad wanted me for the Trofy Wife. So am I in that situation again.? No love for me just looks good on the arm.>
well, that was my little pitty party
thanks for the input...just need to vent..

He the one thing I have found out as my wife has gotten older is she has gotten better more sensual. Don't sell yourself short. He needs to understand your hurt. If the two of you don't get that solved then there will be unfullfilled needs and a affair might happen again. Don't sit on this talk to a C.

He the one thing I have found out as my wife has gotten older is she has gotten better more sensual. Don't sell yourself short. He needs to understand your hurt. If the two of you don't get that solved then there will be unfullfilled needs and a affair might happen again. Don't sit on this talk to a C.