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Joined: Sep 1999
Posts: 277
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Joined: Sep 1999
Posts: 277
how do I react to my wifes affair. I have confronted her- twice . once nicely, once not so nicely. He is also married and had kids. She wants a divorce and has filed- although my attorney hasn't received anything as of yet. I have been verbally abusive to my wife and child and am receiving counseling that is going quite well. I guess it hurts to hang on, but that is all I can do. We have a son4, and I am worried about how my behavior has hurt him, but I am also worried about how her behavior will hurt him. I don't want to take him away from her- she is his mother, but this relationship has grown from a good friendship to sexual- I know, just don't ask me how. What can I do. I do not want to divorce her, I still love her, but she does not want me. Sometimes it seems like if I wait it out, she will come to her senses. What other posts should I read or consider. I know maybe I do not deserve her because of my abuse, but I am not that way today. I understand she does not trust me- it will take yaers for trust to come back. help please. any advice would be nice. ( if I buy any more books, borders will be rnamed after me!)

Joined: Jun 1999
Posts: 921
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Joined: Jun 1999
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Covenant-Welcome to the board, it sounds as though your heart is in the right place and your trying to do all the good things you can do. The first thing I would like to advise you on is to breath and live each moment in a moment, there is only so much you can do to change things. The other is Dr. Harley's reading should help. It helps sometimes if you re-read things you might find a piece of advice you overlooked before. But it does sound as though you are doing everything you can and I believe that your on the right road. Good Luck and may God Bless you, Pray that He does as He sees fit to do!<P>------------------<BR>Chick's<P>You won't see things until your ready to not be blind!<BR>

Joined: Jul 1999
Posts: 369
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Covenant,<BR>First of all slow down...... I know this is hard but take everything right now in stride. It will take alot longer to fix this than a couple of days or weeks. Read everything on this site.... All the posts , all the articles, EVERYTHING. Then get into an understanding of plan a and b. Also on this site. <P>Sorry you have to be here but this is the best place for you right now.. When you feel frustrated or angry come here and vent on us.... Instead of your spouse. Don't lose hope just yet..... Things could turn around or thay may not but you will make it through this and become a better person. Patients.......<P>------------------<BR>Rutger......One day at a time.<P>


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