I dont' have a clue what "really" goes on..Is it just watching the ladies dance? Are women available for "rent"? Do prostitutes hang out at these places waiting for a job?

This particular bar that WH was at is in the city - went late in the evening 11:00 pm - didn't get home till 3:15 AM..

IMHO - WH is deep in sexual addiction - I always thought he might frequent a strip bar - but, now I'm sure he did/has....Now I'm afraid for him/me..

Aren't there druggies hanging out waiting to roll you - do police frequent these places and set you up for soliciting?

Am I worrying for nothing? I could careless if he's only going for the "show"..But, since he's been caught in numerous A's - I worry now that he's gonna get in more trouble..I worry for me that I'll be drug thru the mud w/him..

I used to have a good friend that told me his W would always rather that he went to a "strip bar" than any other bar cause she knew he couldn't pick anyone up there.

I think your biggest concern if you truly don't care if he goes for the show is that a guy could spend lots of money there.

Not really an expert but I wanted you to get some feedback.

I'm not an expert either, but I think it depends on the bar. I know a few strippers who do prostitute, but I think this is probably the exception, not the rule.

It is illegal for the 'audience' to touch the girls....they aren't allowed AT ALL. The girl can touch you, but you can touch them.

I am not a huge fan of strip bars (Well that may be because I'm a woman..LMAO), my WH has gone to a few of them with friends, nothing excessive, and he hasn't gone in years, and I always said "Don't come home after someone ELSE makes you horny and expect sex with me!" <---------Yeah I am the 1st one to admit that I now would be okay having sex with him after someone else made him horny......as long as he's ONLY having sex with me. I guess the old saying "I don't care where he gets his appetite, as long as he eats at home" rings true.

-Caren

Agree with MR. E. At least any strip bar I ever went to (really don't like them, only for batchellor parties) was a complete waste of time if you were trying to pick up a girl. My W would love the part where I would be so geared up, that when I got home, well, you know.

I really do wonder about guys who consistenetly frequent these places. If this is your H, he may not be hooking up in a singles bar, but there is definitely something wrong at home. I just never saw the point of getting teased by these women, and all they want is your money, and you are never going to 'get any'.

As far as drugs, hookers, and everythying, it depends on the place he is going. Some are very clean, even classy, others are ratholes where you can get about anything you want.

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by CarenMc:
<strong> I'm not an expert either, but I think it depends on the bar. I know a few strippers who do prostitute, but I think this is probably the exception, not the rule.

It is illegal for the 'audience' to touch the girls....they aren't allowed AT ALL. The girl can touch you, but you can touch them.

I am not a huge fan of strip bars (Well that may be because I'm a woman..LMAO), my WH has gone to a few of them with friends, nothing excessive, and he hasn't gone in years, and I always said "Don't come home after someone ELSE makes you horny and expect sex with me!" <---------Yeah I am the 1st one to admit that I now would be okay having sex with him after someone else made him horny......as long as he's ONLY having sex with me. I guess the old saying "I don't care where he gets his appetite, as long as he eats at home" rings true.

-Caren </strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">It depends on the city you are in.

For example, in Houston, TX, in several of the clubs, it's "anything goes" when getting a lapdance - touching and more can frequently be found. Then again, New Orleans, LA (of all places) is well known for its "poor quality" lapdances - very little touching and no "extras".

There are even web sites that have "reviews" of the "level of service" available in these clubs.

It depends upon the establishment, really. Is the question related to what happens in the front rooms or in the back rooms?

My SIL used to wait tables in a strip club. She was the preferred waitress to wait on people in the private rooms where the strippers were in hot tubs with the clients because she didn't complain about or report the cocaine use.

I'm not a big fan of them either and I'm a man. To much temptation. Just because some things are illegal don't mean they don't happen. Why do you thing under cover law enforcment stings happen. The only lap dances he should be getting are from his wife. That isn't a bad thing.

Just a question so please don't anyone take offence but what is so classy about a woman demeaning herself be stripping infront of strangers?

When we were first married, I told my H that I would not mind if he went to these places occasionally - like for a bachelor party or something -- *as long as I knew about it ahead of time.* I didn't want him sneaking off while the little wifey sat home clueless.

He thought this was great. He would brag to the other guys about this arrangment. I was so proud of myself for having such a great guy who agreed to go along with this.

A few years ago, I found out that he'd been going to these places on his business trips -- sometimes alone and sometimes with his brother -- spending our money on these women and keeping it all a secret from me. And he had been doing this for several *years.* Chicago, Columbus, Vegas -- you name it, if he's been in the city he's been to their strip club. There are strip bars of some description in every city and town you can name.

Can't tell ya how stupid I feel now.

Strip bars are a way for men to get sexual attention from women. Period. The fact that the women have be paid to give it to them doesn't matter one bit. All that matters is that the women *seem* to be doing it because they want to, and it can turn into a real addiciton for some men. See above.

Strip bars are often a step on the ladder leading to prostitution. The guys finally get tired of just watching and want something more, kinda the way smoking dope can lead to something harder when a little weed just doesn't do it for ya anymore.

Nothing good can come of a married person looking to other people for sexual attention, whether it's an OP or a stripper or a wh*re. It's not harmless. Don't let anyone convince you that it is.
Mulan

I have only ever been to one lap dancing bar hwre ethere was a brothel attached and that was outside Johannesburg in South Africa.

I have been to lots of strip clubs because when I was a salesman for my old company, the middle manager 'influencers' in customers would always choose titty bars over any other form of corporate entertainment. It was titilliating for these brown-jacketed bores but its just sad really. Bored girls with an utter disdain for the audience bumping and grinding near but not on the punters.

It one of the least sexy environments I can think of. I see nothing even slightly provocative about a bored girl barely old enough to be my daughter moving to bad music for money.

It hurts,
I can tell you from alot of experience that most stip clubs are clean. My wife and I went to alot of clubs together before dday. Most do have "back rooms" but even they are clean (most of the time). Lots of teasing to empty your wallet. I will say though that I have never been to a club where touching the girls was never discouraged as long as you didn't touch the wrong place (breast or privates). If you are a woman you can touch anything you like (never figured that out) Also you CAN find clubs that you can obtain "full service" from the right girl. There are several clubs San Francisco that simply put, are nothing more than a brothel with a strip club cover. You have no real concerns for the police, it is rare for them to bust the client. You have no concerns about "druggies" rolling your H (we've never met anything but kind respectful people) It's the girls you have to worry about, they will clean your H's wallet out all on thier own, nothing left for a thief. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" />

You can research the club your H attends if you like. Many websites devoted to "reviewing" the clubs and particular ladies. Clients will tell stories of thier "night out"

Hope this helps, Sleepless