Guess what? I am going to be sued for libel/slander by the XO of WHs ship! Apparently the Commander heard about the website and didn't like what I said. So the entire military force's money is now mustered against me.

The website has been taken down and my friend is choked at me as well. I sent an email to the wives support groups saying that WH and OW lied. So now there is an investigation. OF ME! AJAG is involved. I need a very good lawyer!

AND, now WH might lose his job. And he wants to put an RO on me. And he has emails where i am POed and he says I am crazy, threatening, and incompetent.

So, he won't let me see DD. EVER. Or that is the plan.

I have to email a retraction or be frickin' sued. WTH is going on here? WHY AM I WEARING IT?

<small>[ February 04, 2005, 05:16 PM: Message edited by: fightingalone-again ]</small>

Seek legal cousel. ASAP.

Praying for you.

-OAK

FAA - I've been thinking about all of this...

How can a Canadian military officer sue you? I didn't see ONE thing on your webpage that listed any names or the name of the ship, or the name of the OW... Now, you've called your H, dork...but that's not slander if it's true <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" />

I think that your H has talked to the XO and is getting him to put some pressure on you... Until you actually get a summons or something 'official' from a judge, I'd just lay low for a while and see if they're bluffing...

"official" letters from the XO don't mean squat... YOU aren't in the navy...your H is.

Just my thoughts.... and I hope that I'm right.

Semper Fi,
RIF

NO, NO NO. My friend that presented the separation agreement which BTW is now torn up, is reallly POed at me too. We have been friends for years. He says that I am in SERIOUS TROUBLE. THey want to make an example of me. I wanted them to investigate my complaint. THey said they did. THey woldn't tell me how they came to the conclusion. And becasue the Commodore heard about this especially because I said in more than one email that WH lied, this is HUGE!

Between the website and the email to all the westcoast ships support groups, THere are only 7 or so, the military is out for blood. And WH is determined to get DD permanently.

FAA... I don't know what to say. It's an outrage. Try not to panic. Tell us about the laws in CA. In the U.S., people always threaten to sue each other for slander, but it rarely actually happens because to be slander it has to be a lie, and it's too hard to prove the lie as a plaintiff.

GC

Expose the lie and uphold the truth. Plain and simple.

For those who want t/d the opposite, it w/b shown in due time.

Consider what they said t/b an attempt to scare you as a person. Check out what you as a citizen have as your rights.

That OW had better be real good to be worth all this exposure. If she's that great, you'd have to wonder why she would want a WS, when she could have ______? <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" /> All these people are willing to risk their careers t/b associated with 2 people flaunting adultery? Amazing.

<small>[ February 04, 2005, 02:00 AM: Message edited by: Orchid ]</small>

<small>[ February 04, 2005, 07:47 AM: Message edited by: fightingalone-again ]</small>

Sounds good 2 me!! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" />

Fagain, are you post on MB safe? Should you delete them, ask your lawyer.

(((FAGAIN)))

Jelly

Jelly, I am going through my posts.

THis may be the end of the road for me.

FAA,

The Canadian Military sue??….never heard of it before. Canadian courts don’t entertain malicious lawsuits and certainly don’t award punitive damages regarding statements made about a federal agency. Heck EVERYONE badmouths our federal agencies. I can’t see it happening. As well…the DND is media shy…they won’t want the publicity generated by a forlorn spouse over a cheating husband. Sound like a bunch of saber rattling to me, nothing more.

Having said that, of course one needs to obtain legal counsel to deal with the possibility. Civil suits take an enormous amount of time, nothing would happen right away.

Well, I have worked on a retraction letter. My goal was never to have the military take this personally. I thought that their investigation was very one-sided. ANd that is my personal opinion. BUt since I shared that opinion publically it can be miscontsrued as libel. Apparently, they did their job. <img border="0" alt="[Teary]" title="" src="graemlins/teary.gif" />

But, since they have never contacted me to let me know what they took as evidence, I guess I will never know.
Here it is. <img border="0" alt="[Teary]" title="" src="graemlins/teary.gif" />
</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">I would like to retract my email messages to all of you.

It was done with no thought as to how it could be interpreted. While my goal was never to impugn the integrity if the military command, it was a very irresponsible thing to do. My desire to understand how they arrived at their decision without any input from me, caused me to react from an emotional, rather than factual position, and without foresight.

Furthermore, anything that was posted to the website was a personal journal of my own opinions and feelings. I have since removed the website information and this letter will go in it's place.

I further regret that my earlier emails have undoubtedly led people to misunderstand the personal concern behind the official military position regarding disciplinary action with regards to sexual misconduct investigations. I hope everyone can learn from my poor judgement and mistake to help build a stronger relationship and communication between the military and it’s spouses in the years to come

I would like to apologize to the XO and the CO and their families for any hardships or ill effects caused as a result of my messages. As well I would like to apologize for any misleading information that I inadvertently passed along.

Again, I apologize if I misrepresented any of you in my writing. I tried my best to capture the actual events through my personal viewpoints. If you were hurt by any of it, again, I apologize. As a result of my letter having been posted on several websites and of the various inquiries this generated, it has come to my attention that my opinion and analysis was misinformed, faulty, and accordingly I need to retract my opinion.
Words, no matter how they're used, create bias.

</font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">SIgh, Now I have to send it to everyone individually including the DOrk so that he can pass it along to his command. Maybe he can keep his job.

Oh well. I am straight to D now.

Don't do it!

c'mon, you're letting them bully you.

Go to a reporter on a local news station. See what they think. The military is terrified of bad publicity. The reporter knows how to say it so that it is not slander or anything else.

And the reporter knows when it's not going to be interesting to anybody - and will tell you so. I don't think there is any risk in this. Oh, and make sure it is a lady reporter. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

-AD

My H says to talk to the Judge Advocate General

http://www.forces.gc.ca/jag/main_e.asp

1) Make sure that you are in the right, and have not done something "un-towards" on your website. Ie - making comments that are not in the interest of the public good... If you are in the wrong, attempt IN WRITTEN COMMUNICATION to settle amicably outside of the justice system. Make little or no unrecorded conversation.

2)Save all correspondence related to the incident. Often people, particularly overzealous officers, will overstep their bounds. Hopefully you will be able to use some of this behavior to apply pressure back from the JAG.

3) Go to the media and get sympathetic support. The public does not view a mix of military and infidelity very kindly.

These all come from my H who was in the military and has dealt with their justice system.

ds

Hi FA,

Both "AD" and "deeplysorry" have struck on the strongest ally you'll have...THE MEDIA! Present your "story" to the media, any media, all the media. Time to push back at the bullies, not collapse.

FAA--WAIT--do not send any email or do ANYTHING right now at this moment. Take inventory of the situation. Check out what binder said. You've done you're research with everything else. Do your research on this too.

As long as you have only presented the facts and kept your opinions to minimum (regarding your personal situation) and no "threats" I'm really not sure "how" they could do what they are threatening.

<small>[ February 04, 2005, 11:19 AM: Message edited by: LINY ]</small>

Hey FAA... fellow Canuck here. First of all, talk to a lawyer. As long as what you said was true, that's an absolute defense to libel in Canadian law. Do NOT send the retraction without getting legal advice first.

Secondly, I agree with whoever said it... the media would LOVE a story like that. You just know they would, given the various "boondoggles" of the last few years.

Well, I have an appointment with a law firm on Monday afternoon. And I got a legal opinion via phone today.

The phonecall consisted of me reading him the letter that I sent to the ship's support emails.

He said there was no case for libel. Not great judgement because I had my name on the site. ANd because of WHO I contacted. i.e. bigwigs. <img border="0" alt="[Teary]" title="" src="graemlins/teary.gif" />

THe thing that ticks me off is that ALL I ever wanted was for WH to deal with the issues. Stop lying and yes, even face the cosequences of his actions! I NEVER wanted him to lose his job. I have been furious enough to wish he did. BUt that is not the same thing. DD and I would lose as well.

Yet now I am being intimidated, WH is threatening to use my emails that I have sent him to take DD away from me. Of course only the ones where I am reacting in anger or pain. But, they could be construed as the acts of a vengeful wife. Of course, I have the others, where I am conciliatory, and trying to deal with what is happening and begging him to reconsider.

FAA -

Sorry to ask this if you already posted this, but I did not see it anywhere when I read back through your thread -

Who exactly conveyed the info to you that you were going to be investigated/potentially sued?

Was it your WH? Did you receive a call from JAG office..a letter?

If it came from your WH - I wouldn't trust a word he had to say. Why in the world would the Canadian Military sue you? It would cost them more than it is worth, not to mention no matter how you may have reacted in a few emails, etc. - they would end up with way more 'egg' on their face and they know it.

It would be a no win situation for them. While I'm in the US and not Canada, the military doesn't like to sue even when they should! The cost of litigation, media exposure, etc. even when they have an actual reason, is often not worth them going through with it.

Also, if it was your WH - he will say and threaten ANYTHING to make you back down. Don't roll over if it was him conveying the message. Heck, don't roll over for anyone. Your WH has taken enough from you..don't let anyone else do it to you - especially not him. Why in the world would the military, if they were after you...tell your WH when they know he would go blabbing back to you? If anything, I think they would have threatened him from one end to the other if he were to 'talk to you' about something they are considering a lawsuit over..which no sane court in the US or Canada would want to touch.

If I were the judge, I would be laughing...

Betrayed FAITHFUL Canadian Military Wife vs. Adultery Supporting Canadian Military..

Man, bring it on...and sell me a ticket to that show.

I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers...I am glad you have an appointment with an attorney!

FYR

Seriously, call the JAG office. You may even take advice from the Padre's office. NEVER underestimate the power of the clergy in the military system.

There is very little repercussions an officer will risk over persuing a civilian in a civil tort case.

Rather, ask the JAG office for information on Queen's Regulations and Orders (QROs) and Canadian Forces Administrative Orders (CFAOs). Arm yourself AND your lawyer with information regarding the military justice system options. I believe you will find more than enough "leverage" to disuade even the dumbest bullies contained there-in. Your lawyer will know best how to apply this new information.

Also, civie lawyers only know the civil and criminal legal system, not the military system. It has its OWN conventions, and is a very different animal. Understand it, and apply it against them.

Believe me, i've been through and through the military justice system. If you are reading this and you are American, I believe the pertinent information you are after can be found in the Universal Code of Military Justice (UCMJ).

if you are going to fight a bully, do it from a position of strength. Show them that you can whip them in their own back yard and dont have to wait for them to come to yours.


Airborne!