You are hurt and angry...not the right frame of mind to think about divorce.

Do plan B first. Try legal separation or something like that to protect yourself financially.

Take care

I told you, go to the IG at the local base near you. The IG will keep things confidential...only those people that NEED to be in the loop will be. Also, it is against regulation for ANYONE involved in an IG investigation to talk about the case to anyone else. So, you wont have to worry about all the office chit-chat.

Look, I understand your money concerns. But believe me, the Army WILL make sure he takes care of his family. If he even tries to put credit cards ahead of you and the kids, he will have an Article 15 so fast his head will be swimming. And he will be forced to have his pay sent straight to you!

On your son, do what Orchid said. Your WH needs to hear this...in his fog, he believes they are alright. They are not! Let them tell him. Let him feel the consequences. And let your kids express themselves, as it will be good for them.

I have been telling you for over two weeks now that the IG is the way to go. So, how much longer you gonna let him keep dragging you down this road? Oh, and you can go to Plan B!! You write the letter and do no contact. Sure, there is limited contact now. But with the IG involved and him having to leave OW, added in your son's letter, and then yours saying that you want the marriage but can no longer live this way...his world will change drastically. And it is change that causes the fog to blow away. And even if it doesnt, it allows you to escape him!

Call the IG today!! Have your son write that letter and mail it. You write your Plan B letter and mail it. Then sit back and see what happens. You cannot change your husband, but you can change this situation. So, dont you think it is about time?

In His arms.

<small>[ February 15, 2005, 08:06 AM: Message edited by: Mortarman ]</small>

Raven,
Since you aren't comfortable calling the SGM, why not try MM suggestion before filing for divorce?

MM--what is the acronym IG for?

Inspector General

Thanks a lot for your replies!
My WH just called a couple of minutes ago and talked to both our kids and then with me.

He asked me why our son was so short with him on the phone and I told him "Well, what do you think?! He thinks you don't care about him anymore and it would be important for him if you would start calling again more regularly".

Then he talked to our son again for a long time, I did not ask my son what they talked about because I think if he wants me to know, he'll come to me!

H tried to get me into a long nice talk too, told me that he had instructed a civilian teacher now to take over his classes soon.

I said "Oh really, so what does that mean?"

He answered that he now would only have to call Branch and see if he can come back on an assignment over here, so what now mortar?
Is this still fog?
After that, I told him I had to pass the phone on again to our daughter since I still had a lot to do and was busy. I felt that he wanted to talk some more but oh well, I also want so much!

Oh yeah, he also thanked us for the package he received today with the telephone cards and he really did call right away, didn't he?!
Can you really be so broke, that you cannot even afford a phone call? <img border="0" title="" alt="[Confused]" src="images/icons/confused.gif" />

This is the email he send to our children earlier today, I guess before he picked up the package with the phone cards;

"Hello,

How are you doing? It's been awhile since I've heard from you. Would you give me a call? I would like to be able to hear from you. So how was your weekend? Mine was alright. I bar-b-Q'd sunday. I look forward to bar--b-Qing with you all again. Well gotta go for now so keep in touch.


Love
Papa"

How much of this talk over all these months about wanting to come back can I take serious?

Good night to you all and thanks a lot for your support.
Sorry mortarman, I know you are right, I'm just hoping so much to solve this without creating even more pain and sorrow for everybody.

Raven <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

Thanks a lot for your replies!
My WH just called a couple of minutes ago and talked to both our kids and then with me.

He asked me why our son was so short with him on the phone and I told him "Well, what do you think?! He thinks you don't care about him anymore and it would be important for him if you would start calling again more regularly".

Then he talked to our son again for a long time, I did not ask my son what they talked about because I think if he wants me to know, he'll come to me!

H tried to get me into a long nice talk too, told me that he had instructed a civilian teacher now to take over his classes soon.

I said "Oh really, so what does that mean?"

He answered that he now would only have to call Branch and see if he can come back on an assignment over here, so what now mortar?
Is this still fog?
After that, I told him I had to pass the phone on again to our daughter since I still had a lot to do and was busy. I felt that he wanted to talk some more but oh well, I also want so much!

Oh yeah, he also thanked us for the package he received today with the telephone cards and he really did call right away, didn't he?!
Can you really be so broke, that you cannot even afford a phone call? <img border="0" title="" alt="[Confused]" src="images/icons/confused.gif" />

This is the email he send to our children earlier today, I guess before he picked up the package with the phone cards;

"Hello,

How are you doing? It's been awhile since I've heard from you. Would you give me a call? I would like to be able to hear from you. So how was your weekend? Mine was alright. I bar-b-Q'd sunday. I look forward to bar--b-Qing with you all again. Well gotta go for now so keep in touch.


Love
Papa"

How much of this talk over all these months about wanting to come back can I take serious?

Good night to you all and thanks a lot for your support.
Sorry mortarman, I know you are right, I'm just hoping so much to solve this without creating even more pain and sorrow for everybody.

Raven <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

Thanks a lot for your replies!
My WH just called a couple of minutes ago and talked to both our kids and then with me.

He asked me why our son was so short with him on the phone and I told him "Well, what do you think?! He thinks you don't care about him anymore and it would be important for him if you would start calling again more regularly".

Then he talked to our son again for a long time, I did not ask my son what they talked about because I think if he wants me to know, he'll come to me!

H tried to get me into a long nice talk too, told me that he had instructed a civilian teacher now to take over his classes soon.

I said "Oh really, so what does that mean?"

He answered that he now would only have to call Branch and see if he can come back on an assignment over here, so what now mortar?
Is this still fog?
After that, I told him I had to pass the phone on again to our daughter since I still had a lot to do and was busy. I felt that he wanted to talk some more but oh well, I also want so much!

Oh yeah, he also thanked us for the package he received today with the telephone cards and he really did call right away, didn't he?!
Can you really be so broke, that you cannot even afford a phone call? <img border="0" title="" alt="[Confused]" src="images/icons/confused.gif" />

This is the email he send to our children earlier today, I guess before he picked up the package with the phone cards;

"Hello,

How are you doing? It's been awhile since I've heard from you. Would you give me a call? I would like to be able to hear from you. So how was your weekend? Mine was alright. I bar-b-Q'd sunday. I look forward to bar--b-Qing with you all again. Well gotta go for now so keep in touch.


Love
Papa"

How much of this talk over all these months about wanting to come back can I take serious?

Good night to you all and thanks a lot for your support.
Sorry mortarman, I know you are right, I'm just hoping so much to solve this without creating even more pain and sorrow for everybody.

Raven <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />