FL, you wrote: </font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial"> At the risk of being too personal...

How do you pray with the kids, like what words, do you say the Lord's pray together, or do you have some other prayer you both say in unison or do you say a "free form" prayer outloud to her and you both say amen. or do you each say a bit and then conclude with amen. or do you say something and have her repeat the phrase???

i would think it depends on the age of the child.

i have not been good about praying with the kdis for so long. i did wth my daughter when she was very little, and it was the "God bless mommy, ..." type of thing. i'm not sure i have ever done even that with my son. on a very rare occasion i have tried to pray outloud with my son recently as i worry about him more. he genearlly seems to have more unhappiness in him than my daughter, i fear he has my disposition, he can be extremely happy and act very goofy but then he can get really down too. and even more of a concern for me is that he often talks about how no one likes him and he seems to always need more.

my daughter is more like my H, her range of emotions is narrower. she is also generally content with life. she has her problems, she is 15 after all, but she seems very healthy. her and i, even at the age of 15, still have a close relationship too. we get on each other's nerves sometimes but we are close under it all. she confides in me and actully likes hanging out (which she straight out tells me I should be extremely thankful for cuz most of her friends don't like their parents, i tell her i am!!!)

my daughter and i have talked about God, she does not really like going to church but she tells me not to worry because she believes in God and she prays every night. she is 15, my son is 10. i figure i am way too late to pray with my daughter, and if what she says is true, then she is doing just fine on her own anyway. i'm not sure how she ended up with the habit of praying. maybe i'll ask her that sometime.

how about a 10yr boy, think i might have luck with him? when we have prayed, he has been open to it, he has not told me to go away or anything!!

and then there is my husband. i have tried to talk about prayer, especially as i have struggled with my relationship to God, this would of been before he knew anything about any As. i have also asked him to read the power of the praying husband, not interested. i have and read, although not lately, the power of the praying wife. i first got that book as i was struggling to break free from the addiction of the As.

One thing i miss so much.... for a few months prior to the first d-day, H was finally going to church with me on a somewhat regular basis, as he finally heard how much i would like to go as a couple instead of sitting there on my own. not only did he start coming, we would hold hands. that meant so much to me. i hope that comes back someday.

so RIF (or anyone else), any thoughts, suggestions?? both for the kids as well as with my H?? </font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">For us, our daughter's age pretty much determines how we pray with them. Our youngest is 7 so she still prays basic "God bless..." type prayers. Our Middle daughter is 9 and her prayers are a little more in-depth in that she understands the concept of salvation and has actually made a profession of faith. Our oldest daughter is a senior in HS and her prayers reflect her spiritual maturity that her little sisters haven't reached yet.

I try to model the "A.C.T.S" method of prayer for my girls:

A - Adoration . God always loves to hear our praises so I start my prayers off with this.

C - Confession . Sin in our lives blocks us from communicating with God. I ask God to show me any area of my life that I need to confess.

T - Thanksgiving . It's easy to get caught up in the things that are going wrong in our lives, and in the areas that we need help with... This part of my prayer is devoted to thanking God for all of the blessings in my life.

S - Supplication . This part of my prayer is where I ask God for sepcific things... I usually start off with requests for my wife and for my girls... then any other issues for other family members and friends (this is where I normally pray for my MB friends)... Lastly, I ask God for specific things that I need in my own life.

I'm sure that there are many other "ways" to pray, but I've found that the "A.C.T.S." method works best for me...

Semper Fi,
RIF

RIF, thanks for starting this thread.
i hope i don't sound toopathetic for asking such detailed questions... i really want to give my kids a good solid base for their faith but it's just not something i have seen modeled at all in my life when i was a kid. (my step mom was a nun until she had an affair with my dad and then ended up marrying him) right before i was to be confirmed, my mom yanked me from the program. she left the catholic church. depending on which parent i was on a given sunday would determine what church i went to,

anyway my remaining question is on the method you use with your kids. do you do all the talking and they just respond with an Amen? at age 9 (mine is actually 10) do you encourage them to put in their own thoughts?? the few times i have tried praying with my son recently, i have first asked him how his day went and then i would say a prayer outlout and try to incorporate his thoughts. i like your different focuses, represented by the word ACTS.

i must admit, when i have done this with ryan, i've felt a bit uncomfortable myself, i am not very elequant with my words, not that God needs elequance, i just don't want to model for them a pathetic excuse of an attempt at prayer.

ok, before you get all over me for that last stmt, yes i know i am being too critical of myself. but i don't know that enough to actually go back and change my words.

at one point i tried joining 2 co-workers to a lunch time prayer group. this was in the midst of my As, and the one prayer partner knew i was struggling in my marriage. i'm not sure if i had already confided in her about my actions. i did eventually. i didn't go very often, i just didn't know how to comfortably pray outloud with another person like that.

seems pretty silly that I would be wanting to try to get my H praying outloud with me when i am so uncomfortable doing it.

<small>[ February 07, 2005, 11:50 PM: Message edited by: FinallyLearning-T2M ]</small>

Hey FL - I've tried to teach my girls to just "talk to God"... I've found that they generally follow my example with their prayers...

Without getting into a deep discussion about the different ways to pray based on religeous preference, I know that generally speaking, most people have a hard time praying...

I think that much of this stems from our expectations that our prayers "have to be perfect" in order for God to accept them. I believe that God is a loving God and he will accept our prayers in whatever form they are presented as long as they are prayed with a sincere heart.

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial"> seems pretty silly that I would be wanting to try to get my H praying outloud with me when i am so uncomfortable doing it. </font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">I don't think this is "silly" at all... I think this ties in nicely with MyAdvocates post of what it means for the man to be the spiritual leader of his family... I look at my prayer life and the prayer life of my family as MY God given responsiblity. I know that some may disagree with me, but that's OK. This is what I believe, and it works for us...

Hope this has helped...

Semper Fi,
RIF

RIF, thanks for sharing your thoughts.