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Okay David....the worm may be turning for yoru WW.
It may be close to time to go to Plan B. Very close. I hope you have your PBL ready and your plans in place.
You have court tomorrow, right? Well, stick to it. Orchid may be right and this could be a ruse to get you to let off. Go to mediation and be firm but loving. If she comes by tonight and asks her to stop the court deal, tell her that you are willing to work on the marriage, willing to do what it takes. But that you also must do so in the light of day.
You want to believe in her, but only actions will do here. So, tell her what she has to do to have all of this shut down. I went to court and got custody, afraid that once we did, it would be all over with. but, it was going to court that woke her up...and we are having a remarkable recovery so far.
So set the terms, be loving...but dont you give in on those kids. she may be waking up...but she aint out of the woods yet.
In His arms.
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hey david...
i had a personal breakthru this weekend...posted on Iville2...
hope all is well with you
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MM - - I think you helped me again - go figure. I've been paicked and depressed all day, haven't even gotten up except to drink coffee and a littl housework. Kids are coughing all over the place. All I need it sick kids again...great.
Yes, I think I am completely stressed about tomorrow, and the fact that she is stressing isn't helping - she's virtually crying out for me to help her (not literally) - she keeps driving by, calls and then hangs up, has been crying, isn't studying, and apparently her 'friends' have pretty much left her for the wolves. While I feel so deeply sorry for her that I want to rush over and carry her back home, I'm just letting her go thru this alone.
I don't know what else to do. It hurts to see her in pain, and I can tell when it's genuine.
And MM - I am terrified of Plan B.
David
<small>[ February 13, 2005, 06:16 PM: Message edited by: tanelornpete ]</small>
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Oh, I am not saying you are going to Plan B. Actually, you may need a Plan A letter to give her right away.
What is that? Okay, I am making it up as i go along here but work with me. A letter to her tonight, telling her what she needs to do to come thru this...that you are still there. That you still love her and you believe in her and your marriage. but she is going to have to do the right thing now.
As with a Plan B letter, something like this will be a light in the storm to help her find her way out of the fog. You have to show her the way...and I think maybe she needs you to do that now.
In His arms.
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</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by Mortarman:
<strong> Oh, I am not saying you are going to Plan B. Actually, you may need a Plan A letter to give her right away.
What is that? Okay, I am making it up as i go along here but work with me. A letter to her tonight, telling her what she needs to do to come thru this...that you are still there. That you still love her and you believe in her and your marriage. but she is going to have to do the right thing now.</strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">I'm with you - I'm not ready for plan B but I feel it coming. I sent her a great plan A letter about a week ago, got back one of the nicest, kindest replies from her that I've gotten in a long time - it reached my W. Of course, WW set back in soon after, but I may try it again tonight...
David
<small>[ February 13, 2005, 06:44 PM: Message edited by: tanelornpete ]</small>
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David- Okay, I can't fricken take it anymore.......what the hell does your MB i.d. mean??? And guess what...you are going to HAVE to go to Plan B before long. Why are you letting her take her things a little at a time?? Pack that sh*t up and have it sitting by the door the next time she comes over ..... that'll be a rude awakening for her....Heck I'd even have the "painting" you were talking about in there with the stuff. Maybe I'm just being a hard @ss, because I'm in Plan B now, and I don't know how else to be....LOL I'm a FANTASTIC hard @ss...I know how to do that about the best of anything...LMAO (They're trying to beat that outta me in therapy) <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" /> -Caren
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David-
This song reminds me of you.
Papa Roach - Getting Away With Murder
Somewhere beyond happiness and sadness
I need to calculate
what creates my own madness
and I'm addicted to your punishment
and you're the master
and I am waiting for disaster
I feel irrational
So confrontational
To tell the truth again
I am getting away with murder
it isn't possible
to never tell the truth
but the reality is I'm getting away with murder
(Getting away, Getting away, Getting away)
I drink my drink and I don't even want to
I think my thoughts when I don't even need to
I never look back cause I don't even want to
and I don't need to
because I'm getting away with murder
I feel irrational
So confrontational
To tell the truth again
I am getting away with murder
it isn't possible
to never tell the truth
but the reality is I'm getting away with murder
(Getting away, Getting away, Getting away,
Getting away, Getting away, Getting away,
Getting away, Getting away, Getting away with murder)
Somwhere beyond happiness and sadness
I need to calculate
what creates my own madness
and I'm addicted to your punishment
and you're the master
and I am craving this disaster
I feel irrational
So confrontational
To tell the truth again
I am getting away with murder
it isn't possible
to never tell the truth
but the reality is I'm getting away with murder
(Getting away, Getting away, Getting away)
I feel irrational
So confrontational
To tell the truth again
I am getting away with murder
it isn't possible
to never tell the truth
but the reality is I'm getting away with murder
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</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by CarenMc: <strong> David- Okay, I can't fricken take it anymore.......what the hell does your MB i.d. mean???</strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">LOL!!!! Tanelorn is a a mythical city in a set of Scifi/fantasy books by Michael Moorcock - it's the City of Peace - people journey there for rest and safety. And Peter is my favorite apostle - always putting his foot in his mouth, saying the wrong thing at the wrong time....etc. I can identify with that. So I put them together - maybe the idiot will one day find that peace (= (He will) <strong> </font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">And guess what...you are going to HAVE to go to Plan B before long. Why are you letting her take her things a little at a time?? Pack that sh*t up and have it sitting by the door the next time she comes over ..... that'll be a rude awakening for her....Heck I'd even have the "painting" you were talking about in there with the stuff.</strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">I talked to some friends about doing just that last night - may just box everything up and put it in the garage with a note telling her it's ready to go. I just didn't want to go thru all that stuff - a lot of real pain involved in some of that. <strong> </font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Maybe I'm just being a hard @ss, because I'm in Plan B now, and I don't know how else to be....LOL I'm a FANTASTIC hard @ss...I know how to do that about the best of anything...LMAO (They're trying to beat that outta me in therapy) <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" /> </strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial"> My kinda woman! LOL. I know plan B is in the near future - but you also know what hell you have to go thru to finally DO it. I'm in that hell right now, and she is really good at messing with me. She knows I adore her and love her, and I think she uses that a little to get her way. She did admit to me earlier today that she realized that she was way too controlling and had spent years cutting me off at the knees. DUH! Been trying to tell her that for years. (Unfortunately thru DJs of my own). Right now she doesn't know how to handle the fact that I refuse to LB her in any way... David
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</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Okay, I can't fricken take it anymore.......what the hell does your MB i.d. mean??? </font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">THAT was funny... I've been Laughing My @ss Off for 5 minutes now... So now it's... Caren: Plan B Comedienne, huh? <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> (David, no disrespect intended at all!!)
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Caren - </font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial"><strong>This song reminds me of you. Papa Roach - Getting Away With Murder</strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Damn! I'd forgotten all about that song. Does sorta fit, huh? Davidiot
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</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by tqt: <strong> (David, no disrespect intended at all!!) </strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">None taken <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />
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David-
I'm in Plan B currently....gave WH PBL today...and he's pushed his way in my house once, and I talked to him on the phone once....because he wasn't taking no for an answer from DD10....but I basically just said "Did you break up with OW?" He said "No" I said "Is your car out of her garage?" He said "No, why are you asking me all this?" I said "Then I have nothing to talk to you about" and gave the phone to DD10.
-Caren
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</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by CarenMc:
<strong> David-
I'm in Plan B currently....gave WH PBL today...and he's pushed his way in my house once, and I talked to him on the phone once....because he wasn't taking no for an answer from DD10....but I basically just said "Did you break up with OW?" He said "No" I said "Is your car out of her garage?" He said "No, why are you asking me all this?" I said "Then I have nothing to talk to you about" and gave the phone to DD10.
-Caren </strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">I know hon - I've been following your posts - that's where I'm headed - just terrified of it right now.....
David
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</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial"><strong>Somwhere beyond happiness and sadness
I need to calculate
what creates my own madness
and I'm addicted to your punishment
and you're the master
and I am craving this disaster</strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">I'm going to go insane before I figure out how to stop this......
David
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David-
It is big and scary....but I'm bigger and scarier *evil grin*
-Caren
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David- </font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial"> Somwhere beyond happiness and sadness I need to calculate what creates my own madness and I'm addicted to your punishment and you're the master and I am craving this disaster I'm going to go insane before I figure out how to stop this...... David </font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">You're the only one that can get you out of this......you have to stop being the victim.....Towards the end of Plan A, I didn't feel like a helpless victim anymore, having a Plan made me feel less out of control. -Caren
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David-
Here's an excerpt from a song by 3 Doors Down -
No matter how hard I try
You’re never satisfied
This is not a home
I think I’m better off alone
You always disappear
Even when you’re here
This is not my home
I think I’m better off alone
-Caren
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Dear Caren-the-Human-Jukebox, WTH is going on?! The Grammy's are on right now, and I'm thinking about turning the damn TV on, but I'm afraid I'm gonna miss something HERE... ! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />
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LMAO I am the human lyrics machine....I aspire to be the human jukebox...LMAO
-Caren
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Ok, so, I've been listening to the radio a lot, and with that STUPID holiday coming up tomorrow... what is it, Flag Day, I think(?)... I don't know why they're playing all this terrible lovey-dovey crap ALL weekend for Flag Day, but... I FINALLY heard a good love song a few minutes ago: Love Stinks -- J. Geils Band. And I have this picture of you pressing "G7" on your head, and the lyrics pop up <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />
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