Ok...my Wh left me a message...
He had my son yesterday and was taking him to the store....I called and asked my son if his dad was taking him to get a haircut. My son started crying and said no...I don't want one. I tried to talk him inot it because his father was supposed to take him Friday when he had him last. Anyway....this was the message...

WH: just wanted to let you know I talked to DS about being disrespectful on the phone to you about his haircut. I asked him to call back and apologize several times. When he kept saying no he wouldnt, I made him tell me that he "takes full responsability for his actions (and for any effects it may cause, as little as they may be, if any) and that he has no one else to blame but himself for causing any disappointment, hurt feelings ect. Once he repeated that to me, I left the subject alone."

That is exactly waht he said. I had to keep playing it over and over to get the wording right.
My question: WTF???? He's supposed to be the father...if my son needs a haircut I would expect him to get him one, not ask if he wants one. I just don't understand what he's making him repeat this crap to him. My son is 8!!!! He doesn't understand what my WH is talking about.
I think my WH should look in the mirror and repeat this crap back to himself. UUGGHHHH!!!!!


?????????????????

Oh GAWD Tree, he's projecting his feeling onto your son.......that's what that was and it's bullsh*t!!!! And I would tell him in no uncertain terms never to do it again.

He's telling your son to apologize to you because he knows that HE needs to apologize to you. He is seriously messed up in the head.

-Caren

Caren...
I know...that's what I thought. I'M SO SICK OF THIS GARBAGE!!!!!!!! He's really screwed up in the head!!!! I swear, I don't know if I can deal with this crap for the rest of my life. He better snap out of it and get a grip! If he wants to ruin his life then go ahead but don't try to mess with my son's head and screw up his life anymore than it already is because of my WH actions! UUUGGGGGHHHHH!!!!!!!!!

I agree with Caren.

Keep the recording of that message, you may need it in the D.

I had to send WW a very terse email after she told my kids "I'm 99% sure you are going to lose the hopuse because daddy made me spend $2000 on an attorney"

I told her "NEVER DISCUSS OUR SITUATION WITH THE KIDS AGAIN"

Now, your WH didn't discuss your sitch, but he did try to make your DS feel like the WH that he is, and he had no right.

I would protect your DS from this man, I think you said that DS didn't want to be with WH one time before, or something to this effect. Might be time to have DS talk to a counselor, or your pastor to see if he is being emotionally abused by WH.

I pray that it is not happening, but you need to be on the lookout for it.

So Sorry for your situation

Very off the wall. Not at all appropriate. Do they hear themselves when they speak ever?

Hosea.....I have no idea of knowing what my WH says to my son. My son doesn't wanto tell me anyting! Even when I ask him what he had for dinner when he's with his dad...he always says "why do you want to know" He seems annoyed. I try not to ask too much.
I just don't want him filling my son's head full of crap!

cyllinlisa....no, I don't think they hear themselves...I would love to record everything and play it back fro him one day in the future. It's so frustrating!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Oh Tree.....lay the smacketh down on him and quick. Will you see him when he drops him off??? I would have DS go into the house and talk to WH outside.

I would say "You stupid @sshole, what was that garbage you told MY son? Don't you tell him to take responsibility for his actions....You don't take responsibility for yours, you f-ing hypocrite. You Better NEVER say anything like that to him again......you owe HIM an apology"

You don't have to cuss, I just throw that stuff in there for emphasis. But I would rip his head off and sh*t down his neck.

-Caren

Tree...I'm was the Poster Child for Failed Plan B attempts. Trust me, it is by far, the most difficult thing to do in spite of the person being deliberately cruel. I don't post often, but my heart bleeds when I read your posts. I would like to give you my e-mail and my IM address...and tell you about how I was able to finally get around doing Plan B the right way, and finally ending the chaos that reigned in the wake of contact. My name is Kim, but lots of folks call me Kimmie. My e-mail is Karena_Darling@yahoo.com and my IM is the same....Takola can vouch that the sea ran out of fish, she used them so much on me....Star*Fish nearly ripped her hair out in trying to get me to comply, and Le...well her homestate of Texas was tiny, compared to the migraines I gave her in the constant repetition. Yet, when these fine folks finally drummed into my head what Plan B is truly meant to do...save me, my sanity, and my life going forward, I understood the necessity, and the importance of doing it right....

Please try to contact me, I would like to give you some advice...

kim

Karena.....she's not in plan B.

-Caren

karena....thank you! I wrote down your addy.
I'm really not in the typical plan B. I guess I'm more in plan DV. I don't want my WH back but I do want him to stay out of my life and stop trying to control me with his crazy crap. I also don't want him filling my son's head with all of his garbage! I truly don't know what plan I'm in to be honest with you. I just know that I want this divorce to be over with!!!!

Caren....I would love to say all of that to him but I'm afraid he will use it all against me.