I am looking to Plan B in the near future but I'm worried about the legal aspect of it. Child support, mortgage, visitation... etc. I've been trying to contact lawyers in my area but no one i've called is offering free consultations. I'm not quite sure plan B involves all of this but I need to find out first. So i'd like to ask all the MBer's what you have done/are doing.


I live in VA and have mortgage. When I plan B will I be fully responisble for the mortgage? If that is the case, I will not be able to do it. What about if he moved in with a friend? We do not have any family in the area and not too many friends so I will not be able to move out. Should I allow him to take our DD whenever he pleases?

In the meantime I will continue to contact lawyers. I'd appreciate any input. Thanks!!

<small>[ February 16, 2005, 11:24 AM: Message edited by: much mahal ]</small>

^ bump

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You must speak with a lawyer before moving out, or trying to kick him out. See if your county bar association has a referral service, and you might get the initial consultation for $20 or so. But it's worthwhile even if you pay the regular rate for an hour.

Good luck.

You need to talk to a lawyer about the possibility of getting interim spousal/child support when he moves out. That would help cover your mortgage costs.

But you do need to talk to a local lawyer even if it costs you some bucks because the laws very everywhere.

Miker

Thanks tmmx and Miker!

I found the number to the referral service. Its $35 for the initial consultation and I should hear from them today. That's quick. I will definitely ask them about interim spousal/child support.

I need to take care of this soon and get my plan together. Everday is becoming more difficult to be around him. More often he is putting me down, calling me weird, saying stuff under his breath, and just being selfish.

I think he is avoiding conflict. There are things that I do that annoy him (that never annoyed him before)... he'll either say something smart or say something under his breath. If I ask his about it he won't know what to say. Maybe I'm asking in an offensive way that makes him afraid of what i'll say next. I hope not.

I'm still working on exposure... I've already spoke to my MIL and one of his coworkers. Next will be to ask his other coworker... he will be the one that my WH will probably stay with.

I am so glad you are checking out the legal aspect.

You DO NOT MOVE OUT of your home. You and the baby stay there.

I would talk to the atty about a set visitation schedule. A baby needs routine, and you need to have total control over who is allowed around the baby. This is one area I would be very strict about.

It was his choice to have an affair, now he will see what the consequenses of that stupid choice are... until he ends it and starts to rebuild with you as a family. So he may have to struggle to continue to pay the mortgage while he lives elsewhere. Oh well, so sad, too bad for him.

You are a very young mother far away from family. You should have no problem getting what you need to continue to live in your home from a legal standpoint.

Mahal-

Put a shout out to Mortarman.......I believe he lives in VA, and it is a *FAULT STATE*...this is good for you <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

He can give you advice....you're doubly lucky, he's the plan B czar, and he lives in VA so he knows exactly what to do in that state <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

Edit your initial post.....and change the title to Plan B and legal issues in VA.....that oughta catch Mortarman's eye <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" />

-Caren

<small>[ February 16, 2005, 08:09 AM: Message edited by: CarenMc ]</small>

Hi weaver...

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial"> You DO NOT MOVE OUT of your home. You and the baby stay there.</font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">I will certainly do that. When my WH started talking about D there was no way in my mind, that if he left, I could have stayed in that house but it took awhile and i'm over it. There's no way I'm leaving. I won't let him stay at OUR house and be comfortable.

One thing I will have to worry about is a car. If he takes his car I'll be left with my little 2 door. I don't think there is much room to put our DD in the back seat.

Thanks Caren... I will change the name of my post. I need all the advice I can get.

Oh, the referral service called me back. I can see someone on the 25th. I also talked with an attorney at my work. She will provide me with names of family lawyers that she knows and/or who they know.