There are so many emotions going on right now.
If I talk all over the place, its because I am.
I met empty's girlfriend.
I thought I would be hurt or jealous and I was not. She is very cute and empty must be in heel heaven. I told him he would end up with someone who was comfortable in heels. He said that is all she has in her closet.
I was informed that he was no longer allowed to talk to me about anything but the boys. When and if we did talk he was to let her know everthing we said and at what times I called.
Okay, thats cool.
Everything is short and to the point now.
We met half way when it was time for me to drop the boys off. They, Empty and his girlfriend said nothing. The boys tried to get their dad to say hello to their brother but he would not even acknowledge that he existed. He would not even acknowledge that I existed. It was very strange. I am wondering if it will be this way forever. I was told that I could now have the boys every other weekend. It has been hard for me to drive 4 hours there, turn around and do the 4 hours back and then do the same thing 2 days later. Empty has informed me that at this point he is unable to help. That meeting last weekend took away from his plans and his pocket book and that he would not be able to do it again.
Not sure how this is going to work. I can't talk to him about it because he is hell bent on not negotiating at this point.
There really is nothing I can say, I have made my bed and now I must lie in it.
Making the best of a bad situation is my only solution.

Excuse me? The OW is dictating how and when you are to speak to your H?! WTH? Are you D yet? Why are the boys w/ them more than w/you?

I obviously do not understand all of your situation, but you sound defeated and I hurt for you! Why on earth would you make any of this easier for him? Why should you have to?

I am not getting this at all.... so sorry you are obviously in alot of pain....

lucidity...

I am sorry to read your post...and sorry to read the sad tone....

we all know that he is allowed to do what he chooses...even he knows that...
he chooses not to talk to you...not because SHE or anyone else says to or not to...and he should take ownership of that....

I also say move to where your boys are...
and can't really understand any reason not...move two hour closer if you must....

what is going on the legal side of things...
are you two divorced/divorcing....

ARK

I have put my family and my H through hell.
At this point I am just happy to finally see my boys after 5 long years. To know that I can hold them without feeling the pressures that were felt under H's roof.
I am happy that he is with OW.
He has gone without for so long.
Which by the way, has been his choice.
He now wants to move on and if that means that I am finally able to be in the boys life.
I will take it.
I am in pain but it is my own doing.
Pain is a process I will go through to heal. Let me tell you, it is much better then being in the fog.

Lucidity,

I'm glad you're back here.

I'm sorry you're in such a bad situation.
Like you said, it was the results of your choices, but still you can try to move forward from this to a better life. Please correct me if I'm wrong in what I say to Tx-RN.

Tx-RN,

There is more to the story. I'm not trying to beat up on Lucidity. She's pretty far down - lost custody of her boys, etc.

So... just the facts.
Lucidity left home, lived with OM, had an OC.

Her H used to post on here, but gave up, found his own OW.

Sad, sad story.

-AD

I'm glad you're here, and glad you are OK. These folks can help you move forward.

And thanks for the updates. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" /> Been wonderin' whats been going on with you guys. I really don't know what to think or say. I believe your H has made some bad choices. But no one can change that. Some are good too, though, ya know? ... like some boundaries that seem to be in place.

Take care of you.

Faith1

<small>[ February 18, 2005, 10:40 AM: Message edited by: Faith1 ]</small>