Where to begin?
MIL lives nearby (less than 15 min.) and she is not shy about expressing her opinions, thoughts, and attitudes about ANYTHING. She's been divorced for over 20 years and has had many BFs (some of whom lived w/her and H as he was growing up). She does not ever want to marry again.
MIL likes the whole family to vacation together and gets a little pissy if we have other plans or MY family has plans. I become the bad guy when I say no to her plans. This year alone she has mentioned: a trip to New Hampshire, Las Vegas, and now a 2 week cruise to Alaska (for 2005)! H and I only get 2 weeks vacation a year and she gets 6 b/c of govt. job. We also have credit card debt that I am trying to pay off.
I said no to NH because my grandfather passed away right before Thanksgiving. My H is going so he can see his GM. I used all of my vacation up, including bereavement leave, and took leave w/out pay so I have NO vacation left. I'm accruing time but I need to get back to see my GM b/c we need to clean her house to sell it right away. I'm saving my accrued time for this trip and hoping to go by May. I was also hoping to spend some time with H this year on a mini-vacation somewhere this summer. I don't know when that will happen. I *think* she stopped pushing for Vegas but then again this Alaska trip came up last night.
She brought it up last night at dinner, which I hate, because she blurts out, "I think we should all go to Alaska for 2 weeks next year". I feel like I can't say no sometimes and I don't really get to discuss w/H when she does that. He seemed interested but didn't say yes. We all discussed cost and vacation time. I didn't commit to anything but I'm just angry for feeling like I've gotta be the bad guy again if we say no.
First of all, WHY do we have to spend so much time with her and the whole family? The last vacation we had was for the funeral. The last vacation alone was our honeymoon-7 yrs. ago! I like his family but we did a cruise in 2003 (4 days) and I barely saw my H! He was in the casino with his brother all the time and we did separate shore excursions. I don't like the thought using up my entire 2 week vacation to spend time with his family. Although, Alaska would be nice to see. But it's so freaking expensive.
How do I handle this when it comes up again (besides slapping her upside the head!)? She just doesn't get that we like to be ALONE on vacation sometimes.
