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Many of you know my sitch from the "You guys were right" thread. Okay, I have exposed to WW's family and two of her closest friends. I am guessing that she is now trying to peddle her lame excuse story and still denying that there is an affair going on. Now, I am starting to get calls from these folks asking how I am sure. I have been telling them that I have undeniable proof and it is documented and in my hands. But, at this time I dont wish to disclose how I obtained it (cell phone records, personal email account, checking account records and my own journal which can be cross referenced). I think they know I am not bluffing and I have something, but the family and her closest friends want to believe that WW is not capable of this. So, my question is, do I disclose my sources and risk losing access to that information after they tell WW what I have? How important may further information be if we go to plan D? I appreciate the input.
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Is there anything you can give them that would not disclose your source?
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I say no. If you have proof, it's only your business. They are likely to tell her what you have. It's better for her not to know exactly what you have. JMHO
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Mel, if there is, I sure havent thought of it. I did disclose a little more that I didnt get from the previously mentioned sources. But, it is my word on what I saw against her denials. The real damning proof is the written documentation of her cell phone and the email messages I have found. Right now I dont think I want WW changing those passwords for some reason. Part of me says, hold these cards for now, and the other part says full steam ahead you already have all the proof you need.
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If you feel like they don't believe you, show your hand. Exposure doesn't work unless the affairees know they've been REALLY busted. Mere "rumors" are not as good.
That said, your prior report of turmoil between the infidels indicates you should go real slow and not expose too much too fast in favor of the turmoil getting a chance to work its wonders. Remember, exposure is a tool to be used only as much as needed to disrupt the affair. If the disruption is occurring for any other reason, exposure should be surgically applied - no carpet bombing may be needed.
WAT
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Thanks guys. I have to tell you that my first inclination was "Scorched Earth Policy", but I thought better about it and now you have confirmed that what I have been doing is correct.
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Absent info that the affair is having problems, scorched earth may be the way to go. It gets the calculated LB over with all at once, but may do unnecessary damage to recovery. Carpet bombing vs a laser guided smart bomb. Each has it's usefulness.
I am one of the biggest advocates of quick and to the bone exposure on this forum. But I try to temper the zeal of some BSs to go all the way all at once. I think the optimum approach is the expanding concentric circle analogy - start close in with the OP's spouse and close family members of the WS. Expand the circles if these are ineffective.
Use your head and feel your way.
WAT
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oh boy, I am with WAT! Don't disrupt things when the counterparts are busy tearing each other apart. Their fights only work in your favor. And if you make any moves right now, you will be the bad guy instead.
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On a more humorous note. I have discovered that it is possible to go online to the sprint website access an account and send a text message from WW's phone to OM's phone. I can hear it now.....(WW)I didnt send you that message! (OM)Oh yeah......look at this! You cant even tell the truth when it is right in front of you." Could be a lot of fun. Probably not worth the risk of them finding out who and how it is being done.
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Wow, that could be fun.
"I'm late this month."
Best not to help the implosion. It'll come.
WAT
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This morning I find that the access to cell phone records has been changed. Evidently she has had a moment of lucidity. So, what I am considering at this point is taking the past two months of records that I have printed out and making copies and sending them to all those that I have exposed to so far. I also have a copy of an email confirming further the affair that I can print and mail out as well. This will provide the undeniable proof to those that are still buying into her lie. What do you guys think?
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Does he also 100% deny the affair?
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Have not spoken with him since the last of January, which at that time he told me nothing was going on and he had no interest in my wife. Did not believe him. As per the wise sages on this board, I knew they would both deny. I contacted him to make him nervous and to let him know I was onto them.
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When you have private telephone conversations or face to face conversations with you does she admit it? If so, ask her why she lies to everybody and how they would feel if they knew she was lying? Tape record the whole conversation. Then play the tape for those who need to hear it. Even the Bible sasy to expose the truth and that all things shall be revieled with time. Honesty and truth are very important.
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Tread lightly. If your wife did not give you her email password and you got it "some way", you could potentially get into B I G trouble. Same with her cell phone records.
You could spill the beans about what was said and who she called without letting anyon eknow exactly how you found out ("she left her cell phone bill on the table and I looked at it" or " she printed an email and it was still in the printer tray").
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Stormy......both still deny. If it wasnt so damn sad it would be hilarious. As far as the passwords go, she left them written down by our computer at home. There they were, all I had to do was use them.
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Crushed,
WAT is a highly exprienced guy in all of this, so I hesitate to disagree with him.... but...
I think you should hold your cards tight.
You know. She knows. He knows.
This is not a court. You don't have to show your evidence yet.
On the other hand... If she's shut the door on the cell records, then maybe you've lost that data-path anyway, and releasing the records could help.
You've already given OM's W a heads up. She's going to be watching - even if she says she doesn't believe you.
There are other ways of checking up on your W. Use every thing you can think of.
-AD <small>[ March 03, 2005, 01:01 PM: Message edited by: AD ]</small>
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OM is divorced. Divorced in 2000. OM has liberal visitation rights with children. I dont know what kind of moral fabric his XW is made of, so I dont know how effective exposure to her would be. I know that if I were in her shoes, I would have grave concerns about allowing an X to exhibit such behavior in front of my children. Divorce decree did not mention infidelity as grounds.
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Sorry Crush,
I misread your earlier post - though you had exposed to OM's W.
-AD
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Sorry Crush,
I misread your earlier post - thought you had exposed to OM's W.
-AD
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