LOL
I had some fun reading this thread!
OK, way back when his midlife crisis was just starting...
My MIL sent WH a packet of info about his high school reunion. But he couldn't go because we had just spent money going to visit his relatives a couple of months earlier. We didn't even discuss him going, he jost knew it was not possible because of finances.
So it was the weekend of the reunion and he was being really pouty. He had found out that a couple he went to HS with had owned their own business and their own private jet. They had died a long time ago flying back from South America. He was very depressed about this news - BUT NOT because they were dead! He was saying things like: "Bummer, they owned their own company and airplane and I'm just a contract worker" I tried pointing out to him that he should be happy because his contract job paid $55 per hour, he had three beautiful daughters, AND he was ALIVE!
So it's the weekend of his HS reunion and he can't go, and he feels like his life hasn't amounted to much because he doesn't own his own business and plane... I'm in the kitchen washing dishes from Sunday supper and he's in the next room playing his guitar and whining:
"Whatever happened to Saturday night?
Finding a sweetheart and holding her tight?
And I swear he sounds as if he's about to burst into tears. And he just kept singing that same sad song over and over and over...
So finally I stuck my head into the room and joked: "I know what happened to Saturday night:
AIDS - LOL" (Meaning that people can't just go out to bars and 'find a sweetheart' to sleep with like some did in the 70's or they'll probably get AIDS.) Well, he didn't think that was funny I guess because he went upstairs and smashed his guitar to bits! I told him he had to leave but he was already grabbing clothes and headed for the door.
Three days later he called me apologizing, begging to come home and promising to go to MC.
He came to the door with a new guitar in his hands! I said: "You bought another guitar!?!?" and he tried to tell me no it was his old guitar!
I told him our youngest daughter had found pieces of his smashed guitar all over our bedroom. He just shrugged and acted like I was making a big deal over a little white lie.
I was standing in the doorway and almost didn't let him come in. Now I wish I had just told him to go away again - LOL.
One thing about lying - It's not like other things that you get better at the more you do it.
The more they lie, the more laughable their lies become. Yet they act all offended if we don't believe them. I guess they assume we are getting stupid and desperate right along with them?
BTW, my WH broke too many phones for me to count over the past 3 years. Now that I'm in Plan B his latest phone should last a while.
Oh, and I DID get a new coat out of all this! Last Christmas he begged and promised his way back home, I broke Plan B to meet him to discuss what he needed to do for recovery, because he said he was ready to do all it would take. He was only home 6 days and left again for OW. So my daughters and I took back all the Christmas presents we had gotten him (on his store credit card) and I bought myself a beautiful, reversible, embroidered suede, fake fur, knee length coat!
And Orchid! I absolutely lOVE your suggestion that the coat Lisa has the receipt for be reported stolen!
Me thinx it would make a most excellent April FOOLS joke tee hee hee
